Treating Religion as an Ex-boyfriend

For me, I will be talking about my specific, personal bout with religious seperation, but the "ex" part is a more general view of how obsessed middle schoolers treat break ups.

I pine after the experience of having christianity in my life. I dwell on the good and the bad, wondering what I did to make things change, wondering if it were ever real at all. What are feelings? What is faith? I listen to and sing the songs that I shared with the presence of prayer. I look at pictures of when we were together and try to remember exactly what the feelings were in that moment. I check up on my church, wondering what has changed, if they are doing good, if they have new friends; in this moment I try to be casual so nobody realizes how very interested I am in hearing the smallest bit of news about my previous lifestlye that they are still so familiar with. Sometimes people reference Christianity as if we are still together, but how do I avoid embarrasment and tell them that we have parted ways? That I am now alone in the sense of having a faith partnership to depend on. Most people who know that we aren't together try to either avoid the subject altogether or talk about it without acually making any comments to me directly. I am kind in the wake of our seperation. I wish the very best for my former faith and hope that it meets many people and makes them very happy. I applaud them when I hear on the radio that they have made another victory in their cause. And I never naysay them- despite my personal feelings, I do not want to tarnish the name of religion because we could not agree to see things the same way.

The End

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