Theories Contrived at the Dinner Table

I live with these people. Yeah. Nuff said.

The following is a real actual conversation which took place at my real actual dinner table with these real actual phrases spoken by my real actual family. It was originally published on Ficlets at 10:27PM on Sunday, December 14, 2008. But I thought about it recently and really wanted to share it. The one called "Matt" is supposedly my brother. A fact I am not, however, always sure I believe.

Dad: See, the atmosphere is like a lid.

Matt: Don’t you mean it’s like a dome? Like two domes, like a sphere?

Dad: Yes. Whatever—

Me: No no no, Matthew. See, the atmosphere is like a lid. Like a little hat on top of the earth! A little… a little buret!

Dad: A little buret.

Mom: Does it have a pom pom?

Me: Would you like for it to have a pom pom?

Mom: Well, I think the moon should be the pom pom.

Me: Yes! Yes, the moon is the pom pom on the little buret of the earth.

Dad: So global warming is like a buret?

Me: Exactly! No! Like a sphere! Like two burets!

Matt: Like a sphere… two burets!

Me: The earth must be awfully confused because he’s wearing two burets…

Mom: One on either side!

Me: Yes! Yes! And when the thermal vent opens, it the world peeking out between his two burets because he’s too hot!

Mom: He’s wondering why he’s wearing two burets.

Me: Poor confused earth.

Mom: So, that’s how global warming is like a buret.

Me: Two burets.

The End

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