Scene Eight: The Blind Leading the Clumsy

The cast are lounging backstage during the interval of their final Dress Rehearsal.

OTHELLO: This costume’s ruddy heavy!

CASSIO: You’re telling me – aren’t your boots really tight? I swear the stage lights just make them swell up.

DESDEMONA: My hair’s wilting, literally.

The DIRECTOR comes back with a plate of biscuits and everyone helps themselves, mumbling thanks through mouthfuls.

DIRECTOR: You’re doing brilliantly guys, you really are.  Othello, that last soliloquy was perfect, and Cassio, upping the Fop Factor on those kisses was brilliant! But where are Roderigo and Iago?

OTHELLO: Putting the props backstage, they were the last ones on.

DIRECTOR: Make sure you leave something for them – remember Iago has allergies, so I have no idea which of these he can eat.

DESDEMONA: Nah, it’ll be fine. He’s not that st-

IAGO (bursting in through the door): Get me a blasted biscuit before I kill you all!

CASSIO: What on earth...

IAGO: I just walked into the bloomin’ pillar!

OTHELLO (slowly): You mean ... the ones behind the wings?

IAGO: Yes.

OTHELLO: The ones we pass every time we go on and off the stage, that you’ve never so much as brushed against before?

IAGO (irritably): Yes.

OTHELLO: (smirking) The ones we painted bright yellow to stop this happening?

IAGO: ... Just give me a bloody biscuit will you?

The End

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