My Solace

I wake up with a pounding heart and aching muscles. No sweat here, just an inability to breath properly and a cocooned blanket. Was it real? It couldn't be. It was a stupid nightmare, nothing to be afraid of. But then why is my heart pounding, why is it that I can't sleep at night? Why is it that I have this urge to just call a Person and explain why I'm so messed up? Just go on this never-ending rant about my life and how I think I'm so selfish for making People pity me, but secretly wanting attention. And not just attention: negative attention. Something that will make People stop thinking of me as this thing that is better than Them, or sometimes worse than Them; something that will make People feel like they can actually talk to me or tell me Their secrets. I want People to feel like I'm absolutely nothing special, but in a good way.

And then I see her, a dark visage with one bright eye and countless twinkling freckles. The occasional blemish clouds her eye's view and hides me from it's lonely splendor. Was there ever another? Perhaps the sun is the other. I like this side of the Universe much better, she has a subtle beauty. Day is arrogant in his looks, forcing you to look at him, forcing you to shield your eyes in fear of being temporarily blinded. But he's missing a sense of sophistication and intelligence that she has. A sort of distance that makes me chase after her constantly and leaves me wanting more. A distance that tells me You aren't the only one. I see you. And she really does see me, in a way that no Person could; a way that maybe People can't  see me. I go outside, unable to admire her full brilliance, perhaps afraid to know that she is so unlike me and that we can never speak again.

But here in this small town, there is just enough light interference, just enough of a light film of smog to distort her beauty and let her comfort me. And I spill my secrets to her, visually, audibly, telepathically; we communicate. It's all the same. It's my time of solace. It's me and my Night. My half of the sky.

The End

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