(It's lunch time, the gang sit in their usual spot, a bench overlooking the football pitch)
Greg: When I first came here, that pitch was full to the brim with people, now look at it, it's nearly empty.
Danny: Brilliant, more room to play footie!
Wilhelmina: You really know how to make everyone feel better Damien.
Danny: I know I'm a natural, so Willie where's you date?
Joey: I'm right here, why you would say that?
Danny: Thought you'd be gone by now with… well the smell…
Wilhelmina: I've said this before and I'll say it again, you are a real dickhead.
Danny: Bite me.
(Just then Chelsea appears out of nowhere and actually does)
Danny: OW! What the fuck?!
Chelsea: You said bite me.
Helpless TA: She doesn't understand sarcasm, but you probably didn't hear that, your oversized head obviously affected your hearing.
Chantelle: AW! That was well bad!
Danny: Great, rub salt into the wound, (Chelsea is about to do this) not literally. (She stops)
Imogen: Give Danny a break guys, I'll mellow him up.
Aaron: Sure a good blowie, will make him feel better hey?
(He and Gordon laugh at this)
Imogen: You two are repulsive apes… Jesus, I just sounded like my mum.
Greg: Hang on a sec… why are you? (points to the chavs) Sitting with us?
Chantelle: Is that illegal?
Thomas: Not like you ever gave a damn about the rules, but quite frankly, it's strange, so go away!
Chantelle: Oh, nerd finally standing up for himself, ooh I'm scared.
Aaron: I'd like to see him try and fuck with me.
Gordon: Yeah and me blad.
Jaya: Gordon do you have to say blad and fam at the end of every sentence?
Gordon: Yeah fam… well blad… well nah fam. I gonna change my vocabulary fam… by making my last word in this sentence, fucking cunt…
Thomas: Right, real creative Gordon, still answer the question. Why are you guys here?
Chantelle: There's no one else around.
Imogen: So? Hang out with each other then.
Aaron: Ay enough of us, plus we don't want to look like fucking loners.
Joey: There's no one around anyway, so who is gonna see yew guys as loners?
Gordon: THAT YEAR SEVEN!
(They all turn to one tiny little year 7, who has been listening in on their conversation)
Greg: Aw, you okay little guy?
Year 7: Erm… I'm okay.
Imogen: What's a matter, where are your friends?
Year 7: I don't have any left, they all died.
Florence (much louder than necessary): AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
Melody: Thank you Florence, but that was not needed.
Greg: Why don't you come sit with us?
Chantelle: Yeah come sit on me you sexy stud.
Joey: Seriously? A year 7?
Imogen: She shagged kids, this is nothing new, come on little guy, don't be shy. What's your name?
Year 7: Charlie.
Sasha: Aw bless him, his a cute little thing ain't he?
Alan: And y-yet I'm as n-nervous as him, and I'm not c-cute.
Charmaine: Nah, you're too fucking old to be cute, what you looking for? Female attention? Cause you ay gettin it.
Alan: I was-wasn't looking f-for attention of- an-any sort, I was just won-wondering.
Chantelle: Sure you were, still you can be cute with me…
Greg: Chantelle! Not in front of Charlie here!
Charlie: It's okay, I know all about sex and that stuff, I live in Mortdale it's what I've known my whole life.
Greg (pulling out camcorder): Charlie say that again, because do you want to change this town for the better?
Charlie: Yes… hang on… you're Greg Winters aren't you? That guy from Southern USA, whose been changing all the stuff around here.
Greg: That's me.
Charlie: So it is true? About the whole cannon thing at greenwood and you actually blew it up!
Joey: Yeah we were all there! All of its true!
Charlie: Aw cool… did you Greg, did you actually kill Frank Tibet?
Charlie: Whoa you're awesome.
Greg: Well it ain't cool to kill someone Charlie, but Frank had to go, still you going to prom Charlie?
Charlie: Yeah, I got a date... why'd you ask?
Greg: Do you like what I'm doing here, in this town? Changing it for the better?
Charlie: Mortdale has always been a shithole ,where we suffer every day, pain is all I know. But yes, I like the changes that are happening, I like what you're doing.
Greg: Good, cause you're gonna help us, in fact everyone in this school can, it doesn't just have to be us.
Imogen: But it's always been us, just the main gang.
Greg: And if we carry on like this, were gonna be killed off, if the others want to help they can Imogen! They want change and maybe it's wrong if I use them and they die for it, but that will be on my conscious and I'm willing to take it, to change this town for good and forever!
Charlie: So basically you guys are going to make a tape showing how bad this town is? Send it to parliament and demand change?
Charlie: But that tape won't leave Mortdale, nothing leaves Mortdale for good.
Chelsea: We did the once.
Helpless TA: To a nearby theme park, where I tried to kill you all! It won't leave this area there are much chavvier places than Mortdale in the UK you know? This area and up north, they even have rough areas in London, why out of all of those places are they gonna pay attention to this town and this town alone?
Greg: Simple, Suzanne.
Florence: WHAT ABOUT SUZANNE!? ARE YOU SAYING YOU LOVE HER MORE THAN ME!? IS SHE PRETTIER THAN ME! ARE YOU…?
Greg: No Florence no, Suzanne is constantly having to do news reports from this place right?
Greg: So therefore this town has more limelight than others, the MP's will take note and I'll ask them to tighten the rules, not just for this town, but for all rough areas!
Joey: You're rambling on Greg.
Greg: (turning on Camcorder): Shut up Joey, now I'm gonna give an intro…
Greg (Inspirational speech voice): Ladies and Gentlemen in the Parliament of the United Kingdom, my name Is Gregory Samuel Winters. I'm a 15 year old boy who has moved to the town of Mortdale in the West Midlands of November this year and now it's February, 4 months, 4 months that have been the worst in my life. I plea to you, I'm beggin' y'all for my sake and for the sake of all decent folk, stuck in barbaric towns and communities like mine. To harden you rules on crime, so if they do the crime, they get the time and all that, but yeah we want change and the following clip will show why and what we face in this town every day.
(Finishes and turns the camcorder off, behind him Florence was lowering an English flag, Greg looks at her funny when he realises this)
Florence: What? It was inspirational speech, it will look good.
Charlie: Well I'll see you guys later, hey?
Greg: Yeah (They set off to Mrs Layton's Geography lesson)
Chantelle: So he can hang round with you, but we can't?
Greg: Poor guy's got no friends left and I feel like it's my fault.
Charmaine: Well it is.
Greg: Oh well excuse me, for existing and having Shaz burn down my house and kill my family so I was forced to move here and to survive and make your town better. Excuse me for doing terrible things.
Charmaine: Should be excused, it's shameful.
Imogen: Says you, Greg's fighting for change all you've done, is whine.
Charmaine: I don't whine, that's Helpless TA, I don't care.
Helpless TA: I have valid excuses to whine.
Chelsea: They ay about me are they miss?
Helpless TA: Naaaah of course not.
Joey: Still change for the better, hey Greg?
Greg: Yeah (They enter Mrs Layton's lesson)
Mrs Layton: Okay guys, books out, copy from page 1.
Sasha: You alright miss?
Mrs Layton: Fine, why do you ask?
Gordon: You're just telling us to copy from our books, that Mr Tedious thang.
Gordon: Thing then, God some peeps and there grammar.
Gordon: People, fuck da lord man.
Gordon: The! FUCKING HELL LEAVE ME ALONE!
Thomas: And finally, Gordon speaks English.
Danny: His Auntie Jeana would be proud.
(He and Wilhelmina both laugh, as they both secretly watched Auntie Jeana's tape and know Gordon is not, who he pretends to be)
Gordon: Weird fucktards.
Gordon: Oh shut the fuck up nerd! Or I'll…
Sasha: Slap him like a sissy?
Gordon: Yeah fam! I mean no… I'll beat him, like, shank him out…
Aaron: Anyhow Gord, that drug you have would help Miss right now.
Mrs Layton: What drug?
Gordon: gfrynmjuhskfuhdmnkghfunmfhbvnmfvhmuirjeuyhtjrfyudhjf, it can change your personality completely.
Mrs Layton: gfrynmjuhskfuhdmnkghfunmfhbvnmfvhmuirjeuyhtjrfyudhjf!?
Wilhelmina: Yup, that was my reaction, when I first heard about it.
Mrs Layton: Do I really seem that down to you guys?
Charmaine: Yeah you usually just blabber onto Lucy and share life stories…
Joey: I get it miss, you're down because you're grieving for Lucy, well we want the old bubbly you back, so we can doss and get no work done…
Mrs Layton: What!?
Joey:… get lots of work done, is what I said.
Mrs Layton (breaking down on a startled Greg's shoulder): I can't take it! OH POOR LUCY SHE WAS LIKE MY FAVOURITE PUPIL AND NOW SHE'S GONE! OH THIS TOWN THIS TOWN IS SO…!
Greg: Keep talking miss; tell everyone all about this town and how you have suffered. (Pulls out camcorder)