So my friend said that he'd try to set me up with this guy Kyle. I said ok, sure, met him, wasn't that interested. I got a text from my friend Harry who set us up saying that Kyle reciprocated my flirting. I got all excited, you know, I didn't really think I'd been flirting. I sort of said stuff like "Omg really?" "I can't believe this" for a while until Harry finally told me it had all been a joke. No one really fancied me, he'd lied for a laugh. The conversation went like this:
Me: Right. So he doesn't fancy me.
Me: You realise, I hope, that you are a complete tw*t and you've made me feel like an idiot. Go f*ck yourself in a hole, you t*sspot.
Harry: Sorry Sarah
(That, by the way, was clearly an ingenuine sorry. It was a jokey sorry. It was a haha I got you sorry. It was not really sorry at all.)
Me: You d*mn well should be f*cking sorry. Do you have any idea how stupid I feel? I wasn't even interested in Kyle, I am currently interested in someone else. I don't need you to remind me I'll never have him or anyone else fancy me because I ALREADY F*CKING KNOW THAT. Do you have any idea how cr*p this last year has been? I have hated myself so much, I starved myself then I'd binge out, I felt disgusted to even see myself I've been completely depressed actually. And then you, my friend? You go and do something that is complete sh*t. I already know I'm disgusting. People already say they fancy me just for a joke. I don't need you or Kyle to remind me so as far as I'm concerned you can F*CK OFF FOREVER.
Harry: Sarah, I'm really sorry.
(That was a genuine apology.)
Me: YOU D*MN WELL SHOULD BE.
Me: Am I that disgusting? Is it that much of a laugh, oh haha this stupid b*tch I can't believe she actually thought anyone would ever fancy her.
I cried for an hour. Never, and I mean never have I felt so awful.
But guess what? I was in the Kitchen, and I didn't eat anything.