Moses and the Parting of the Opinion SeaMature

Last year, in English, we studied the Bible.  It was an interesting experience, seeing as our teacher was new, Buddhist and clearly a bit uncomfortable in the area.  Also, we had a handful of devout Christians in our class, and a few strong skeptics (not necessarily atheists), so the discussions could get rather heated at times.  The remainder of the students didn't give a shit either way, but found these arguments rather entertaining.

One of the high points for me actually occurred before class one day, during a conversation between one Very Christian Girl (VCG) and one Student Who Didn't Give a Shit (DGS).  An approximate transcription of the event follows:

DGS:  "I didn't do the reading last night.  What was it about?"

VCG: "I didn't read it either, but I think it was about Moses."

DGS: "Who was Moses again?  I feel like I should know this, but..."

VCG: "Moses was the one with the arc."

Me: *waits a beat* "No.  That was Noah."

The look of embarrassment on that poor girl's face was priceless.

My advice: don't be vocal about anything if you don't have your facts straight.  Particularly if you are trying to convince people that that you are an authority on the matter.

This brings me, in a roundabout way, to my next point.  If you are religious, wonderful, but I do not want to be 'saved'.  Jesus loves me? Great, thanks.  God will damn me to Hell if I don't believe in Him?  You know, I'm not a big fan of mixed messages.       

Anyway, when people start, to borrow a word from the River Why, Evan-Jelly-Sizin', it tends to have an opposite-than-desired effect on me:

Oh, I'm going to Hell, am I now?  Well, I'd rather spend eternity in Hell with all of the interesting people than be stuck in Heaven with the likes of you.

I don't say such things of course.  Not to their faces.

The End

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