11-15-2011

11-15-2011

Lord, let me CARE.

Please, God, let me CARE! Let me CARE about our relationship! Let me care about this lack of feeling! My lack of heart is turning into UNCARING spiritual stagnancy!

I'm through with this accursed (almost used a certain curse word right there) feelinglessness. I don't know why I still have this STUPID problem! It's SO dumb, Lord! So dumb! Why does this even have to be an issue?

Strength? Phah!

Control? No way!

Weakness? Yes!

LACK of control? Absolutely!

I was so blind, God, as I dug myself into this trench. I created it - even was proud of it! I thought I'd be able to turn my emotions back on as SOON AS I WANTED THEM AGAIN, but I'm being proven so bitterly wrong.

I can't believe I was so stupid, God. I can't believe I fell for such a lie.

The End

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