basically me pouring out my thoughts and heart about the woman i love
I find it quite amusing.
Everyone, even you give me reasons.
Reasons not to love you.
Not to want to be with you.
Reasons to hate you or run the other way.
But in all those reasons,
No one even asks me my reasons.
Why I want to be with you
Why I try so hard to make this work
Why I love you so much
Fact is even though the last few months
Have been awful, hurtful, deceitful.
I don’t think about that.
I think about all those times you were there.
All those times you chose to love me without reason
Those times when I was hurting and you just held me
When I was afraid and you reassured me.
Even when I gave you reasons to give up, you didn’t.
You make me a better me.
I laugh more, I smile more
And yes, I cry more.
I wouldn’t have given you my heart if I didn’t trust you
You wouldn’t still have my heart if I didn’t still trust you
You have given me reasons to give up
To stop loving you
But I can’t.
I can’t do that to you
I can’t force myself to stop feeling what I feel for you
I promised I wouldn’t just walk away
That I wouldn’t just leave
Those promises still stand until I choose to break them
I swore id be a better person with and for you
And that includes me giving up just because shit got tough
I know you can’t handle a relationship right now
I know part of what you’re feeling is anger towards the world
I’m not asking you for a relationship
I’m asking you to allow me to wait
To wait for you to decide
Be it to be with me or not to
I don’t care, that is a risk I am willing to take
You are my girl, my world, my everything
You always will be
Until the day you become someone else’s
I know I have made you feel like you are replaceable
That someone else can just take your place
That this is just some game.
But it’s not
No one can ever come close to replacing you
No one can ever take your place.
Loving you is one of the most exquisite things I can ever do in my life.
I’m not gonna be like everyone else.
I’m not gonna just walk out.
And no I’m not staying for you
I’m staying because that’s what my heart wants
Every time I listened to my mind, we fought
We still fight
This is me listening to my heart
The same way I did when I fell in love with you.
The same way I did every time we fought and I was tempted to give up
My heart tells me to stay, to wait
To reassure you that my feelings haven’t changed
That my heart is still yours
That even though everything has changed,
Though I guess, I did win.
I do love you more