Jaded Aura

I'm so conflicted and torn about this concept of love.

I beg that this jaded aura is not a lifelong curse.

It's a panicky, drowning feeling, that I allow to consume my hourly choices. I know that it is relentlessly unending, and I fear that it is here to stay.

Unbearable. Obsessive. Mess.

The startling realization that the picture I had painted for my life, really was just that... a picture.

It was never real.

It was just a beautiful illusion that I gazed upon everyday, and then forcefully imposed on the people around me in order to validate its existence.

Oh the fate that I have so desperately bestowed upon myself...

I hope and pray that I have repaid my karmic dues, for if the cycle were to continue, I fear that I may never have the ability to paint the perfect picture again.

I question my judgment, I question my fate.

The End

3 comments about this work Feed