Thursday, July 21st, 2011Mature

I cut today.  It was perfectly stupid and I had no reason for doing it.  I just felt so dead and “needed” to feel something.

I also just finished reading "Wasted; A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia" by Marya Hornbacher.  It's close to the most depressing, hopeless book I've ever read.  She's alive and successful according to the common connotation of success, but there is no hope in that book.  The conclusion of the matter is basically this - she finally found a shaky balance between life and death and in that balance is simply the resolve to live in a world of pain and emptiness and deal w/ life, miserable as it is.

I have no problems after reading that book.  At least it jolts my thinking into perspective...

She is a phenomenal writer though - absolutely amazing!

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