Monday, June 20th, 2011Mature

I went to a body image support group thingy tonight and I wish I hadn’t, ‘cause now I have a choice: to keep going and be opened up to healing and a fuller life, or to close off and keep my “hurt”.  It’s up to me completely.  So will I be a coward or courageous?

            The group leader talked to me afterword, asking me about my relationship with food, my parents, etc.  And I talked, stupid me, I actually talked.  And now I’m terrified.  So scared.  I will be lost if I share this part of me with anyone or anything.  I will lose myself.

            But the choice is mine.

            Help me, somebody!!  Something is so desperately wrong, despite the fact I keep denying it… but what’s wrong?!?!!  NOTHING!!  Literally every time I try to figure it out I can’t come to anything.  I’m eating and I’m not cutting, so nothing’s wrong.

            Help me. 

            Help ME!!!

            HELP ME!!!!!

 

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