Everybody’s got a blank page
A story they’re writing today
A wall that they’re climbing
You can carry the past on your shoulders
Or you can start over
Regrets, no matter what you've gone through
Jesus, He gave it all to save you
He carried the cross on His shoulders
So you can start over

When Flame began his rapping after the hook (above), I was instantly riveted. As I plodded onward in my walking, remorse swept over me. For over a year, I had been trying to overcome the anger, depression, and anxiety that overcomes me whenever I grieve for my loved ones. Time and time again, I had begged God to remove these burdens from me and help me overcome my crippling emotions and the sins and failures that I had committed in response to those emotions (one of which was cutting after three years of no self-harm).

But each time I had asked God for forgiveness, I saw it as placing a Bandaid over my failures. I saw it as God giving me healing salve to place on top of the wounds I'd given myself. And I saw it wrongly.

As I listened to the song, grace covered me. Because, you see, when I ask God for forgiveness and strength, I shouldn't be asking for Him to place my sins in a box along with all my other sins. I'm not asking Him to "forgive me, God, for I am a perpetual sinner in need of constant forgiveness."

The End

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