As Ali stares out of the window seeing nothing, just wondering, thinking, he cannot understand why Saakshi wants to break away from their relationship. Why now after all these months of their seeing each other? Saakshi too is quite confused with her decision. But she is resolute that Ali must keep up with his promise to agree on whatever she decides for them, even if her decision means drifting apart…
Tanya had introduced them two years back. Their thinking was alike and they had hit off very well. Just an introduction had been enough for them to grow close and turn into inseparable friends. They were both non-believers of love and marriage, each didn’t trust their opposite gender and yet they were so close to each other. They had always been more than friends and yet less than lovers. But Faith… faith can be crazy at times…
Saakshi was a tall young woman, wheatish-complexion with a long cascade matching the colour of her eyes. She was a simple person with a philosophical bent of mind, an avid reader of books and faces. Her hobbies were diverse, from palmistry to music; singing, writing, making people laugh and she loved life! Ali on the other hand was a gentle person with deep brown eyes, ones in which one can fall deep down. Perhaps that’s how our simple face-reader Saakshi had felt herself drawn to Ali!!
Since then Saakshi had not given a thought once, of how right or wrong she was. The day his hands caressed her arms, she didn’t stop him. She could feel her unfelt desires rekindling. As if her dead life was given energy and a chance to live. Her skin had quivered with his touch. She had felt a strong desire to reach out but she didn’t dare. Just one touch of Ali and she was lost.
The kind of family she has been brought up in had taught her that if a woman thought of any man before her marriage it was equivalent to committing a sin. Had they to known what she had been upto they would probably have killed her for her non-forgivable felony! For months she had searched for someone whom she could talk about the happenings in her life but she found no one. Were these feelings actually immoral or did they seem sinful just because she had never before felt them?
Ali had not been able to talk about his feelings to anyone but Saakshi. His family would never have understood their relationship nor approved of it. For him it was not considered a sin because he had been taught by his community that men never did anything wrong. If a woman of his community did what he was doing she would probably be looked upon with contempt and hatred and probably ostracized. He had tried to stay away from Saakshi once. She had told him that she too needed a break from him. Those five days had been the longest period for their separation and had seemed like five centuries! The next day he had just walked up to her and held her tight and told her that he could not stay without her.
Their being together gave him a meaning to live, to hope and to love. Her presence had made him feel alive. Her nonsensical talk brought a smile on his lips and her warmth forced him to hold on to her tightly. He didn’t want to think of a day when she would not be with him. So he never thought of the future. Both had unanimously ruled out marriage, primarily as it was not their cup of tea and secondly because they were from different castes. When they got back together from their separation, the topic of marriage was never brought up again.
…Ali breaks out of his reverie and actually looks at the world outside his window. Everything seems the same and yet his world is drifting away… The truth is that they both needed some time to think and yet they did not want to take a decision. As though, they both needed the space to move and yet didn’t want to let go off each other.
Saakshi has been in a constant war with her heart, her mind says that it is not fair to be with a man she will never marry. What kind of a woman will the world call her if they get to know? Her heart on the other hand explains to her that it did not care for the society and the world if she is going to be happy. It is the harsh norms of the society that does not give its’ citizens, a choice to live their lives according to their wishes. These norms sometimes burn the best thing we ever feel and receive. The priceless gift of love is sometimes too valuable to hold in our lives. We never feel our heartburn and turn into wastelands, when we throw love out of it. Very few of us feel that love, we read about in books and yet when we feel it we have no knowledge of how to contain it. And we let it die knowing fully well that ‘love cannot die’.
Saakshi makes up her mind. She smiles at Ali, he walks up to her and holds her tightly. She tells him that when it was chance who has introduced them; they must leave their future in the hands of Destiny. She is not a fool to throw away something as valuable as this for the sake of the cold society.