Four Together, One Alone

Dear Daddy,

I had Science again today. You know, every time I walk to those lessons my heart's breaking. You do know that, don't you? I wonder if you saw it: the four together, and me alone.

It wouldn't be so bad if we were all without our friends, and it definitely wouldn't be so bad if we were all together. But to have some of us with companions and then just me, sitting on my own, with people I've hardly spoken to in a class of people I hardly know -- it hurts, Daddy, it hurts.

Of course you know the pain of separation, and I'm pretty sure you're feeling it every time my jealousy rips another hole inside me. The only thing is, you're not doing anything about those holes, so I'm still on my own, and I'm still hurting, and it's still bleeding inside me.

It's not their fault, I realise that. And perhaps it's for the best, for it's true that when we sat together in Chemistry last year I found it hard to focus, surrounded by my friends. Perhaps the teachers really do know what they're doing, but it's a hard cross to bear, to watch them walk away together and to have to part. I can't help feeling that soon enough I'll get left out of the in-jokes and the meetings up.

Is it because I didn't do my best last year? I'm sure my grades were good enough, or at least quite close to theirs. And that can't be the reason for the split. Can it, Daddy?

Don't let them forget me, when I'm all on my own.

With love,
Your daughter.

The End

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