I've honestly never been very good at making resolutions because I've never seen that much point in them before. Around this time of year, I hear it all from "find a long-term relationship" to "lose weight" to even "lose my V" (bus conversations never cease to frighten and amaze) and I've always met the proclamations with a bit of scepticism. Honestly, I don't know what I could have possibly set myself at the beginning of 2012 that I wouldn't have set out to do anyway. Setting just one seems a little lazy to me, even if it might be a huge resolution, like to climb Everest or get engaged, and there's nothing about 2012 that made it particularly dissatisfying overall. I got better grades than I could have imagined, I had the university offers I wanted and I finally told one of my classmates where she could go. But I've also cried over homework, done selfish things for the sake of my future that have hurt the ones I love, and I still spent this New Years Eve with only two men, one called Ben, the other Jerry.
But believe it or not, I'm going to try and make a resolution.
Why, after all I've just said? Well, because the person who was so sceptical about the resolutions of others was - you might say - the old me. Cliche, I know, but the fact is, this year, everything changes. By the end of this year, I'll be living in a different place with different friends, eating different food and taking different classes. For the first time, my family will be more than ten minutes away (yeah, try five hours eugh) and people won't have bad memories to weigh me down with, just as they won't have good memories to build me up. It all changes, and I'm trying my best to change with it, even though I've a sucker for the old ways. So, I've bought a bike (okay, my dad bought me a bike) and I've got new hair (don't laugh, it's radical and it means something to me) and I've made myself a list of what I want to do at uni (Societies: 7 Drunken Nights: <5 Friends: 3 + (by the end of first term) Social Life: PENDING)
So there's this new me that I have in my head. She rides around on a blue Pashley pike with her dip-dyed hair and her Cambridge satchel loaded with classical books and notepads. Her accommodation walls are covered with photos of friends that she was ready to leave behind, alongside drawings and maps and information on Maegard that visitors can ask and take interest in. She usually lives off toast and bags of dried cranberries but can make a mean stir fry when needed. She's the crazy one that you can't help but like and the one who is so passionate about things that it should be outlawed. And best of all, she's scared out of her brain about all of the above, but wants to do it anyway.
She's my New Year's resolution.