I went to the bathroom for five minutes around one in the morning, and when I came back, I found complete pandemonium. Lyre, Kevin, and Ella were actively fighting over a cardboard cylinder, trying to bash each other with it whenever one had the chance, as Rob and Darrin looked on. After a flurry of blows, colorful words, and a few good thwacking all around, they broke apart, Lyre holding the weapon.
“Let’s play Mario Party,” I suggested. We began the game easily enough, with a few squabbles in between rounds.
“Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey… It’s Bowser time,” Darrin called over the noise.
“That Bastard. Trying to ruin our game…”
“Redistributing our coins…”
“Damn socialist son of a bitch.” As it turned out, only Kevin lost anything and Lyre won all of his coins.
“Oh,” she said, in mock-innocence. “What’s the matter Kev? You look sad.”
“I’m tired and angry.” She made a dramatic pouty face as he continued. “And Bowser just upset me.”
“Poor baby! That mean old turtle…” Ella leaned over to whisper in her ear, no doubt some proposed alliance to win them the game, but Lyre shrank away, wincing. “Oh, I hate whispering. It’s so close. And moist. And it involves touching. I hate touching.” She shuddered. Darrin laughed.
“Wow, you really are a freak.” He earned a whack over the head with the tube for his comment. “Seriously? You just won, like, twenty coins again,” he protested, rubbing his head.
“She’s sleeping with Bowser,” Rob called from his end of the couch. We had pushed him to the floor along with Darrin and Locke.
“Well, maybe you should, too. I’ll do what it takes to win.”
“Yeah, she’s not ashamed of herself,” Kevin sniggered. “At least her affair is out in the open.”
“Yeah,” Darrin added. “I mean, everyone knows your sleeping with Toad.”
“What??” Lyre exclaimed, in mock-surprise. “Bitch! Back off! Everyone knows Toad is mine, that sexy little beast.”
“I thought you got Bowser.”
“Well, between you and me, Bowser is what we might call… my provider. Toad is the one I really love, and hopefully we can be together someday soon.” Rob rolled his eyes.
“This is ridiculous, and you’re soiling my childhood heroes.