She looked at this outing like one views dry cleaning or washing dishes. Something you don't want to do but have to. Supposedly women helped each other through tough times. Cassie had never had that. None of them had. Six girls and six boys trained to be cold blooded killers, Then unleashed on the world. But some how, some way she still had a thread of humanity. She would have to strectch the thread to the max tonight.
Cassie was afraid it would be like looking in a mirror but oddly it wasn't. Jena lay outstreched on the hotel's bed looking past the tv. Sam sat up beside her and was watching her guardedly like at any moment she just might snap. From the look of the wall it looked like she already had. It seemed this state was worse. She was done with fighting something so fruitless. No one could beat death...You couldn't shoot it in the head...strangle it...Death would alway prevail.
" How are you doing?" Cassie asked
Cassie sat on the bed on the other side. She dangled her feet on the side and tried to look relaxed, causal.
" I haven't blown my brains out yet" Jena said numbly
Sam' s eyes darted at Jena and then at Cassie nervously. Cassie waved his concern away.
" Sam here's a dollar go get yourself a pop" Cassie said
" Ughhh...not another pop" Sam complained as he shuffled off.
" There's a mini bar here. Sure it's over priced but it's here and not there...in the hall" Jena mumbled.
" I can get you some meds" Cassie suggested. It was all she could think to help her. Cassie didn't really want to get into all that touchy feely stuff.
" I wish I could medicate it all away. Or go down the rabbit hole awhile... Do you know what it's like to lose your innocence? You want to hold on to it as long as possible but you let it slip away...so you can be like everyone else.And one day you wake up and your jaded. This is ten times worse than that" Jena mumbled
" Your making no sense. I'll get you your pills...and then you can get back to work, be your normal crabby self" Cassie begged
She was actually begging. Fighting for what was best for Jena. Wallowing would get her nowhere. Cassie wasn't sure Jena would kill herself but she wasn't sure she wouldn't...some prozac would give Cassie some peace of mind. But Jena seemed determined to let the darkness take her. Fight!
" I don't think I want to go back to work...I don't think I can now that I felt death, first hand" Jena said meaningfully.
Sam open the door and walked in without his pop. Before Cassie could ask he held out his hand.
" I need a quarter" Sam complained
Cassie fished in her pocket. She handed him his quarter and the ice box. Sam scrunched up his face and opened his mouth to complain.
" Go get your self a pop and some ice for us" Cassie ordered
" The ice machine is on the second floor" Sam complained
" If you get us some ice I'll go and find you some food that isn't covered in grease" Cassie promised.
" I want kraft dinner and hot dogs" Sam said
" You'll eat what I give you" Cassie ordered
" Whatever!" Sam raised his hands in surrender and stalked off.
" I wish I had a little brother...some one to take care off" Jena continued muttering senselessly
" You can have him" Cass muttered " You need to think about this seriously. Do you really think you can live any other life?"
" Haven't you ever thought what it would be like to live your life not as some ones pawn?"
" I'm no one's pawn. Checkmate!" Cassie said anonyed.
" I don't think you can say check mate just yet. Dustin was the easiest one to get rid of. If I were you I'd keep my eye on the quiet ones..." Jena warned.