“I swear to God, if you don't talk straight I'm calling the police” threatened Will.
“It's hard to explain. I'm not lying when I say you are my aunt. Didn't you ever wonder where your family is? How your life was before you came here?”
I feel like my head is going to explode with the thoughts and memories that’re running through it all at once. I've always avoided thinking about my past because it feels vague and blurry. Instead, I focused on my future, my career. But that emptiness gave me a wall of insecurity that stopped me from forming deep connections with the people around me. I simply couldn't open up to someone when I’m not even comfortable with opening up to myself. It always felt like a piece of myself is missing, and I wasn’t planning on looking for it.
"This is how it all started. You, my mother, me and little Jacob. We used to live together and we all helped running our restaurant, we didn't have much money, but we were happy. Until you started complaining from severe headaches that kept you days with little or no sleep. We took you from one doctor to the other without any success with even getting an accurate diagnosis. Until we heard about a clinical trial for a new medicine that helped people with similar symptoms, so we sold our restaurant and moved in here. We didn't have a choice, you were getting a step closer every day to going insane and all we could do is watch. You were kept under their supervision and we were not allowed to visit you for two months where they gave you the medication that eventually cured you, but had one damaging side effect.”
“What is it?” I asked with my heart filled with fear that it’s something deadly. “It left you with no memories of us, the only family you had. My mother was traumatized by your condition. She blamed herself for letting you suffer. She threatened to sue them even though she knows she has a lost case because she signed the consent, they agreed to a financial compensation and with that, she bought you this house and helped you have a decent life before you were well enough to get a job. My mother gave up all she had to help you but all you gave her back was rejection and bad temper. After a while, things started getting ugly, there was always fighting and screaming because she pushed you to remember our past and you wanted to be left alone. You got a job, and you seemed like you were doing great on your own, as long as we are not near you, even Jacob, your only son, who was too young to understand what you were going through. So for your sake and for ours, we went back to our hometown, and tried to re-build our lives.” The world around me felt hazy and all I could hear was the train of thoughts in my head. This can’t be true, can it? Do I want it to be true? This means I have a family, but it also means that I abandoned them. I can’t blink away the tears that’s blurring my vision, so I run away.
Tears poured down my cheeks even when I was running at full speed. With no other place in mind, I headed back to my house, locked the door behind me and wept. Shortly after, Will was knocking my door vigorously but I couldn’t open. Taking him with me was a mistake, getting attached to him was a mistake, going to that stupid party was a mistake, and even living seems now like a mistake.