I haven't wrote in this in a long time. So, I graduated from middle school and started high school. Nothing big or important. Well, I might be starting a club with Cassi at our high school that has writers and artists in it. :) Tried out for the volleyball team, didn't make it. My legs are still hurting two days after. It's amazing how much a person can talk about when she expects no one to listen.
I started a collaboration about me and three other people. It's pretty much a testimony or collection of our memories. Check it out if you want. I've picked up the habit of listening to piano music. It's quite beautiful really. If you listen closely you can hear the unique story full of beauty, betrayal, bravery, love, and the strength of life.
My mom is going to a homeless shelter for families, with my brothers. She is so hard to get through to, I can't make her understand, I can't put the ideas in her head. She wants to live for herself, she doesn't want any help, mine or God's. She told me a while ago that she wants to find love. I tried to point her to love, but she doesn't understand.
She thinks I'm so great and kind and good. She tells anyone who will listen that I have a "pure" spirit. Want to know the truth? Yes? I am mean, angry, and a screw-up. You think I have it all together? Not in the least. I have done nothing to change myself, nothing to help others. I haven't tried to improve myself or change my ways.
I whine and cry, I yell mean words, throw punches, slap faces. I hurt others, I hurt myself. Want to know how I changed? How I am changed? God. Simple, loving, and Almighty. He changed me, He helped me, loved me. When I was all those things, did all those things, He still loved me for who I am. Did I deserve it? Never.
So, why does she think I am "pure"? The things I do now. I try to have patience, try to be kind, try to be patient. I don't do drugs, don't have sex, don't get bad grades, I hardly cuss. I try not to. Am I the reason of all this? No, never have been, never will be. The good things I do? It is Jesus working through me, loving through me.
He is right here, loving us with all the love in the world plus infinity. Here's a good way to describe what I'm talking about.
"For it is God who is working in you, enabling you both to desire and to work out His good purpose."
I believe that explains what I'm saying. Not a hundred percent sure that's exactly where those words came from. I hope you guys understand.
"Lord, almighty on Heaven and Earth. I give You forever praise and forever glory throughout my life! Please show those who read my stories and know me and those who don't know me know Your love. Let them feel Your grace surround them and protect them. Lead them to you. Jesus, loving, caring, forgiving Jesus, open their eyes and enlighten their minds. Give strength to those who have seen the truth. Let all of Your children and everyone on Protagonize believe in You and trust in You. In Your Holy name, Amen."
If anyone wants to know Jesus and have a relationship with Him, pray this prayer.
'Jesus, I've sinned. I have hurt myself and others. I have forsaken you and your gift. But I ask that you forgive me. I invite you into my heart. Please, come into me. Thank you. In Your name, Jesus, Amen.'
Of course, all you really have to pray is telling Jesus that you messed up and you know it. Ask Him to forgive you. Ask Him into your heart, your life. Then you say Amen. You should know, though, that if you don't mean it, then your words are for nothing, wasted breath. It's like that with every prayer. You have to mean it. If you have any questions about being saved or a christian, ask me. Or if you don't feel comfortable asking me or talking to me, then talk to God.
If you don't understand any of this and your confused in the least, post your questions on the comment bar. :)
This is My Life,
P.S. To Jesus be the Glory,
the Praise, the Love, Amen.