Jason was her life now. Jason was everything. Jason was everything she dreamed of. Everything she wanted. Everything she could think about.
I couldn't bear this. I couldn't understand this. I was just a kid. I saw everything happen like a confusing blur. Confusion was what I had grown up with.
For example, I couldn't understand why there was a strange man living in our house when Dad was on a business trip. I couldn't understand why he looked so strange. I couldn't understand why Mom never listened to me when I told him that he scared the daylights out of me.
Why? Why did Mom let this man, Jason, come in our house?
I wanted him to go. He brought darkness to my life and my dad was the light in my life. Jason always left before my dad came home and I could feel the atmosphere change. I felt like the clouds and the shadows were gone and the Sun had come out after a long day. I always collapsed in my dad's arms as soon as he stepped inside the house. He didn't question why I was frightened, he simply thought that I had missed him. And oh, I wish I could tell him everything. But...but, Mom had told me not to. Mom had changed a lot after she met Jason (Only God knows where!). Jason rarely talked to me and the first time that he did, he made sure to threaten me so I wouldn't tell Dad.
But one day, Jason didn't leave. Dad was back and Jason was there. That was the worst time of my life. Chaos. Madness. Mom and Dad shouting. Stuff getting thrown around. And of course, me hiding in my closet, my hands covering my ears and my tears running down my face.
Then everything was over. The next morning, it was quiet. I woke up late. I walked around the house. There was no trace of Mom walking around, making coffee or Dad reading the papers to her. Everything was silent. It felt like the world was holding its breath for me.
I found Dad in his bedroom, still sleeping...alone.
I never wanted to believe. It took me months to realize the fact that my mom had left us because of Jason. I used to say, "no, she just went shopping, she'll be back." then this turned into, "no, she just went to a party." then, "she just went to visit some friends in another city."
I came up with a thousand other things to calm myself down and make myself believe that my mom would come back. That she would come back with a big surprise and tell me that everything was a game.
But that day never happened. Never.
What happened left a scar on my heart and a fear that could never leave me. I was always that little scared girl whose Mom left her, because she wasn't happy with her and the only person she loved and cared about was that mysterious and creepy Jason.