"Rufus, get off the table. Rufus get out of the sink . Rufus get off the computer table". Rufus stop eating the bedspread!"
That's my mom. She just won't let an adventurous cat have any fun at all. I love my mom a lot, but sometimes I don't like her very much.
I like my dad better. He laughs and laughs when I get into trouble. Mom just gets out the water bottle. It can spray water from quite a ways!
Water doesn't work. Yelling at me doesn't work. Bribery works sometimes, though.
Bribery is the only way to get me down off the china cabinet . If she tries to grab me, all those stupid breakable ornaments that live up there will get broken.
I like those crunchy little treats that are supposed to keep the tartar off my teeth. It's not working. I like to chew on grass. Sometimes I have green teeth.
I don't get to go outside without my harness on. My people latch my harness onto a rope that won't let me go out of the backyard.
I want to roam around the neighbourhood, and have some real fun. My people are such spoil sports.
My people leave the door open to the back shed so I can run inside if I want to.
The back shed has no ceiling, just rafters holding up the roof. I like to climb up into the rafters sometimes when I'm still attached to the rope. I like to sit up on a beam and watch my people running around following my rope so they can find me.
People can be really dumb, don't you think?