Destiny awaits mortal man, whether he wishes it to or nay. Destiny, the clanking lock sealing somebody's fate like a chain around the door of your soul. It's a pity really! Destiny implies that you are pulled towards the outcome of your life like a branch caught in a fast flowing stream. Where does it lead? That's up to the God's who decide the fate of humankind. Alll I can say is that in my case it was inevitable, my descent into the destiny which awaited me. To the story then, I can afford to dawdle! Time no longer has meaning for me since, right now, there is no shortage of it.
All my life I have been a thinker. Thinking about this, questioning that. A studious individual, I have always been a loner. I am at peace with my own thoughts and satisfied with my isolation. In my own secure space I can indulge my voyeuristic watching of mankind as they go about their day to day lives. In the world but always apart from it. Always wanting company but never longing for it like some. My favourite place to indulge my voyeuristic tastes was the internet. A fantastic tool of man's devising, the anonymity of a chatroom allowing dark fantasies to emerge and unfold. People are hiding one part of their lives in this mess of complex codes and programming language, but indulging thier hidden parts by exploring and explaining their fantasies.
I have seen humanity rise and fall and rise again countless times. I have seen the evil in men's hearts and the purity of innocence. Heard the cry of a babe on the battlefield or a lovers moan in the privacy of their own bedroom. I have seen and heard all, in my spectators seat apart from the world. Civilisations built and then crumbled to ash. Personage's rise and impact the world around them mainly very little. Except for the great's. Those people whom history shall never forget. Ghandhi, Ceaser Julius, Ghengis Khan , John Lennon. I knew them all. Giants of figures, not in stature but in character. I miss the days when heroes and villians where clearly defined and when man's ingenuity began to impact the world around. From the fall of mighty Carthage to the collapse of Britain's vast empire I have watched and awaited til the decadence reaches it's peak. The time is right!
The world as we know it is corrupted beyond redemption. I am no tool of "God" (pathetic child with an ant farm called Earth) but nor am I Satan's puppet either. I am myself. I am Caine. I am the walking, talking personification of mixed blessings that "God" bestows. For those learned amongst you I am Caine. The same Caine who slew his brother Abel which you can read about in that "perversion" that is known as the "Holy" Bible. They make me out to be evil. Yes I slew my brother, I murdered my sibling. They stop short of telling you why. I loved my brother more than anything but "God" commanded his death, not I! The proof is contained within the vaults of the Vatican like many other writings which do not conform to Catholic scriptures. Possession is not caused by demons but by angels wishing to leave behind their seat in heaven to indulge in base pleasures. Priests in exorcism do not send a demon to hell, but an angel back to the servitude upstairs. Mother Mary was no virgin and neither was Christ. Religious personages would have you believe that purity of spirit has a direct relationship with base desires. That is false. In my experience they hide thier own deep rooted desires for indulgences of a sexual nature that the church forbids. Priests! Ha! God can see into their souls and is not fooled by the platitudes that mankind states whilst taking a knee.
God is not inherently evil but has no conscience. No moral compass to guide him. Just a desire to experiment. God is a scientist with the power to do as he wills. The outcome is the key and nothing more. War, disease, famine and pestilence are all tests designed by God to see us ants scurry and react. Creation is a game to him and things are adapted as a scientific test. It's his personal playground. In my case "God" was both merciful and ruthless.
I stated earlier that "God" commanded my brother's death. That is true. I have no reason to lie. When my sacrifice of grain to "God" was ridiculed in favour of my brother's sacrifice of the blood of a lamb, I was distraught. My "God" was satisfied with a blood sacrifice. The "God", whose benevolance was supposed to bring light and compassion to this world, delighted in the ending of a life. My rest was troubled that night. "God" spoke to me in the silence of my heart and told me of his wish to witness the extinguishment of a human life at the hands of his sibling. He spoke about his desire for more blood to flow in the praising of his name. I pleaded, begged, cajoled and argued with a "God" that would be so callous to demand this from me. I loved my brother but "God" commanded his death and if I didn't comply the consequences where to be severe. The following day my brother's life was extinguished by my hand. Under "God's" commandment and in his name. When the deed was done "God" came to me and thus spake -
" I am sated mine son and now I bestow upon thee the greatest of gifts. Immortality. You shall never die, favoured son, but exist eternally and roam this world I have created. You shall never die. In darkness will your power be heightened, for you must and always will be my unspoken shame. Always living but never alive. You shall not die, favoured son, as long as thou slake your thirst with the blood of mankind. For you are Caine! You are Vampyr! You are transcendent!" That I am! That I am!