Vanessa the Vampire

This is the result of a writing exercise I did a few weeks ago. It isn't perfectly written, but it has the potential to go in all sorts of different directions! So please come and have a play with the story!

Vanessa is a vampire who kills BATs, feral vampires that attack humans with a certain smell. Vanessa has super strength and speed, and vivid pink venom, the only weapon fully fatal to BATs. That's about the only stuff other writers who wish to join in need to know. Mix it up if you like

Cobble-way underground station was strangely busy for the time of day.  The dim artificial lights reflected yellow off the grimy tiled walls, flickering every now and then due to the passing of vehicles on the road above. Everybody remained still and quiet; abnormally so. If she hadn’t seen them walk in, Vanessa would have believed them to be statues. She stood in the centre of the platform, staring at nothing in particular at the wall opposite. The strange air currents caused a slight breeze to stir her long golden hair every few minutes, but she never made any movement to put it back into its place. Then, every single head turned simultaneously to the right. Vanessa could hear it too, the sound of something whistling along the track. A few moments later, a single shabby carriage came in to view. It slowed down and then lurched forwards as it came to a stop. Two dirty doors opened, one at the front and one at the back. The people that had been standing motionless on the platform now made for the doors. They did not talk, push or shove, but walked in an orderly fashion. Vanessa fell in step with them, worried that her cover would not last much longer.


            Inside the carriage, there were no seats. The people all stood around the edges; some were holding handles that were dangling from the ceiling. Vanessa stood near the back, and didn’t need to move at all to maintain her balance when the carriage jumped forward again. In fact, there was only one person who did: a male student, who had a dorky black hair cut, relatively bad skin and was very gangly. He muttered to himself whilst picking up all the papers he had dropped to stop himself from falling over. But he had noticed that he was the only one that was acting, well, human. Any normal human would have almost fallen over when the carriage lurched. Normal humans were not so unnaturally still and quiet. Nobody but him was even breathing. Vanessa saw his face whiten and heard his breathe quicken, but what completely overwhelmed her, was his smell. It had hit her the second the doors to the carriage had opened, back on the platform. He smelt utterly wonderful. There was nothing more she wanted right now than to bury her head in his chest and inhale his intoxicating smell forever. It made her feel pure; it shut out every other little thing and filled her entire body. But she must resist. She must not breathe in.


The student was looking around the carriage in despair. Every pair of cold, unmoving eyes were locked upon him. An uneasy feeling filled the carriage, growing until Vanessa was sure they’d all burst. She remained still; she looked at him with a neutral expression, just like the others. The student began to tremble, causing his scent to come rolling off him in waves. This was too much for the people standing in the carriage. They went rigid at first, as if they had been struck by vipers. Then they collectively dropped into a crouch, ready to spring. Vanessa acted quickly, before the others could attack. In one stride she was in front of the student. She backed into him, forcing him against the wall. She didn’t crouch or take up a protective stance like you would expect, but stood up straight, with her arms hanging at her sides. She raised her chin, as if challenging the others to go for her throat. They snarled at her, displaying glistening fangs, which definitely hadn’t been there a second ago. They could not resist the student, but they didn’t dare go anywhere near Vanessa. She was relying on their tiny brain power to get out of the situation; the moment they realised that they greatly out-numbered her, they would attack as one, and there was no way Vanessa could defend herself and this human against that many BATs.


Vanessa snarled back at them, revealing her own fangs, which were dripping with vivid pink venom. The BATs recoiled at the sight, giving Vanessa the chance she needed. In one swift movement she grabbed the student’s arm and leapt into the air, crashing through the roof. The student’s yells were drowned out by howls of rage. Vanessa didn’t pause. She scoped him up and set off, running at an impossible speed, back towards the station. She longed to hear the howling fade into the distance but to her dismay, it kept up with her. At least some of the BATs were following them. She reached the station in no time at all, but did not stop. She went through the exit so fast that the staff thought they had imagined her. Vanessa could feel the cool night air on her face now that she was out of the stuffy underground, still she didn’t risk taking in a refreshing breathe owing to his aroma.


Once up the steps and on a dark, deserted street, Vanessa put the student down and leaned against a brick wall, covering her nose with her wrist. The student was stunned: he stood there, whimpering and shuddering so violently Vanessa almost left him. But she couldn’t leave, his aroma was far too powerful; however the light-weighted feeling it gave her was now layered with anguish. She was faster than the BATs, but they would soon catch up. Her mind was clouded: she couldn’t think what to do next, how to get him to safety. Before she could gather her thoughts, two BATs came bounding towards them, lime-green venom rolling down their chins. The student turned to run,

“NO!” Vanessa shouted to him, “Stay put otherwise you won’t have a chance.”

To her surprise, he obeyed. She had expected him to follow nought but his instinct. She stood in front of him, taking up a position not unlike that of a sprinter about to go.


Both BATs continued pelting towards them. When they were less then a foot away, Vanessa launched herself at them. All three collided with a sickening smack. The BATs fell backwards, momentarily startled. Vanessa took the advantage and grabbed one by the neck whilst standing on the other. She slammed the one she was holding into the wall with such force the entire building shook. She heard its spine splinter and it went limp. Still, its wild empty eyes stared greedily at the student. Vanessa harshly pushed its head back with her left hand and then gnashed its neck with her fangs. Her venom was the only weapon that would fully destroy BATs. She slung it to the floor and stamped harder on the one already down. It roared at her, from the pain and hunger. Its arms flailed around helplessly as she raised it from the ground and drew it to herself with effortless strength. She sunk her fangs into its exposed shoulder, willing for her venom to flow into its flesh. It wasn’t a pleasurable feeling, but it was natural. When it stopped struggling, she let it drop back to the ground along with the other dead BAT.


Vanessa turned her head to see if the student was alright. Physically, he was fine, but Vanessa wondered if he would ever get over the attack. She couldn’t blame him. She must look quite a horrific sight herself, what with venom dribbling down her chin and fangs that were a couple of inches long dangling from her mouth. She sharply sucked in some air and licked the back of her teeth, and her fangs moved upwards until they looked like perfectly normal incisors. She wiped her mouth with her sleeve, trying to make herself look normal again, so she could go and reassure this human.

            He stood staring at her with unblinking eyes, and with such stillness it put the other vampires to shame. Vanessa stared back at him for a moment, concentrating on not breathing. He must have realised that she would not hurt him. “V-v-v,” he stuttered. He took a shaky breath and tried again, “V-v-vampires!” he squeaked. Vanessa was quite impressed that he had gotten the word out at all.

“Yes,” said Vanessa cautiously, “I am a Vampire, but do not worry,” she added quickly as the human took a step back, “I do not hurt humans, nor do any of our kind.” The student pointed to the two dead BATs on the ground in protest,

“Th-They tried to kill me,” He said quietly.

“Ah, but they are not normal vampires, they are feral creatures that know nothing but hunger. We call them BATs.” Vanessa smiled, hoping that she was gaining his trust. When he didn’t pass comment, she continued, “They are fussy eaters though. They hunt humans that smell different. And you happen to smell scrumptious.” The student fainted.

She would have to take him to the hospital. Not the normal human hospital, the vampire hospital for humans that had been attacked. There he would be given treatment for shock and to prevent an ever-lasting fear of subways.


That was a typical night of Vanessa's life. Vanessa hunts BATs. You could even go as far as to call her a protector of the human race. Her species of vampires only drink animal blood, preferably that of predators. It has a richer taste, you see. So what adventure will Vanessa go on next? Will she fall in love with a scented human, or uncover a coven of BATs with improved intelligence, that is plotting to take over the world and harvest humans? Go crazy.

The End

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