Black dress, or suit. The biggest decision I'll have to make today.I can't believe he is dead. "silver are you ready hunny? we are going to be late," that's mom. Normally she would be roaring up the stairs telling me to get ready for school..... not today. "I'll be there soon,". I don't think I really want to go... everyone will be looking at me, and why wouldn't they..... it was my fault. I could have been there sooner, I could have stayed at home rather than going out with my friends. I could have and should have. Black dress, I'll wear the dress. more respectable.
Hopefully I can get away with wearing my paramore bracelet. She would have liked that... maybe i should put it in with her. She loved them. Apparently that was what she was listening to when she did it. I'm going to wear a suit. She always laughed at me when i dressed up. I wish I could have been there, I could have stopped her... if she listened to me. They say that she was depressed and was being bullied. I know her better than that, they didn't effect her. It was her own choice. She wanted to do it. They found her journal a couple of days after she did it. I've read it, well.... I stole it, but she wouldn't have wanted them to have it. She never signed it, infact she never even acknowledged that it was a journal. She talked to it almost as if talking to someone else.