Chapter 38 - BUT I DON'T DANCE!!!

First to arrive were Joe’s parents in Dougie’s Mercedes Sedan (E-Class – 2010 edition), then my parents, and Sophie in my Dad’s Ferrari F-450 (2010 edition), and shortly after, Joe’s siblings, in Charlie’s Audi R8 (2010 edition). What is it with people and posh cars? And since when has my Dad been able to afford one? That’s easily answered: since he married someone who makes thousands a year.


“If you all want to just go and help yourself to nibbles.” Joe said to them, and showed them the way to the dining room.

“Are they all coming?” Charlie asked.

“Yes; I invited her too, Charlie.” I giggled.

“How did you know where she lived?” Charlie asked.

“I didn’t need to – I saw her in the street when I was in town.” I shrugged.

“I – I don’t know what to say.” He stuttered.

“Thank you would be nice.” I muttered, and he laughed, and said thank you.


Most people came at once, and then to my surprise, my friends from Bigfoot, Danielle and Hayley came too!

Most people went straight to the dining room, but Danielle and Hayley had already eaten, so they went straight to the dance floor, just like Charlie and Rebecca (his lover), and Sally and Dougie.

Emily went behind the sound system and put on some funky music to get more people onto the dance floor.


“Most people are here now.” Joe stated.

“Yup…” I said, rocking back and forwards on my heels.

“Oh… You don’t take hints do you?” He sighed.

“Nope…” I said, awkwardly.

“Would you like to dance?” He asked, and my eyes grew wide.


“Oh come on; I’ll protect you.” He laughed.

“It’s not a joke; as hard to resist as you are, I’m going to have to say ‘no way’; I’m way overdue for bad luck.” I said.

“Okay – it’s not an option anymore; you will dance with me.” He laughed.

I sighed in frustration and hesitantly followed him to the dance floor, against my better judgement of the situation.


He put my arms around his neck, and held me as delicately as if I were a glass ornament, around my waist, and we swayed in time to the music.

“Okay – so it’s better than I thought…” I said, resting the side of my head against his shoulder.

“What did I tell you? You’re a natural!” He praised.

“I wouldn’t go that far – but when you let yourself go in time to the music, it’s actually quite… pleasant.” I said, smiling.


Just then, Emily grabbed hold of the microphone and announced that it was time for the father-daughter dance.

Everybody filed into the room where the dance floor was then, just when I would have been more than happy for the dance to have gone unnoticed with everybody in the other room.

They formed a circle around the edge of the room, and I was left standing in the middle of the dance floor, balanced precariously on the balls of my feet, trying to look for my Dad.


I was searching through peoples’ minds, when my Dad’s mind came into focus: ‘If I just hide under here until they give up looking for me, I’ll be okay.’ He was hiding under a stack of carefully balanced chairs, and I knew where he was as I could see it in his mind.


“One minute – I know where he’ll be.” I said to Emily, and bobbed over to the dining room.

I found him easily, and attempted sweet-talking him into dancing.

“Please Dad – this is a once-in-a-lifetime chance.” I said, batting my eyelashes.

“I’m not budging.” He said sulkily, sounding like a small child having a tantrum.

“You know I hate dancing as much as you do – and besides, I’ve got do it in the spotlight twice; you’ve only got to do it once, and you know everybody’s eyes will be on me.” I reasoned.

“Okay; you got me. Give your old man a hand up will you?” He asked, and I helped him to his feet.


I led him into the other room by the hand, and everybody cheered.

The music started up and to my relief, it was only a two-minute-long track, and was nice and slow, so all I had to do was sway in time to the music, and do a few spins, holding on to my Dad.

Finally, the music drifted to a close, and I hadn’t stumbled or anything. The worst part was over – or so I thought.


Now it was time for the newly-weds dance, and Joe had chosen the music, so I started getting nervous, knowing that it would be something extravagant – I was sure that he wouldn’t disappoint.

‘Relax; just follow my lead.’ Joe thought, and I calmed myself down.

Joe placed one hand on my waist, I put one hand on his upper-arm, just below his shoulder, and we held hands. Naturally, Joe had picked a waltz, so all I had to do was think: (1, 2, 3 and, 1, 2, 3 and…) for my feet, and follow wherever Joe went, so pretty much as normal really.


At first we were just going forwards and back, then he spun me in towards his body, then out again, and then we were waltzing in huge circles, not wasting an inch of floor-space.

I felt slightly disappointed when the music ended, which confused me, but it was the best time of my life – that I could remember, so far.

I went over to talk to Danielle and Hayley, seeing as they had come all the way from Bigfoot just to see me get married.

“I thought you said that you couldn’t dance!” Hayley came and said to me.

“I can’t…” I argued.

“I remember dance class, when we were twelve.” Danielle giggled.

“So do I – the dance teacher said that I had wooden legs! I was the female version of Pinocchio!” I laughed and Joe stifled a snigger.


Just then, Paul came bounding up to me, and grinned at me sheepishly.

“What did you do?” I asked, as it was his ‘I’m guilty but I’m trying to look innocent’ face, my mind thinking of Sally’s best china vase that was stood in the hallway.

“I came to rat on that Charlie dude actually.” He said very matter-of-factly, and his thoughts were coherent.

“What’s he doing now?” I asked, curiously.

“He’s making out with that Rebecca girl – you know the pale-skinned one.” He said, and I giggled (not at the fact that Charlie was making out, but by Paul calling her ‘the pale-skinned one’).

Did he not realise that in the McIvor family, everybody was pale skinned? Including me? Maybe Paul was just partially blind, or exceptionally unobservant. But that’s a good thing – isn’t it?


Emily came over just them, and beamed at me.

“Go upstairs, into my room, switch my television on and put it on the AV channel.” She instructed me.

“Okay – excuse me, you guys.” I said to Danielle, Hayley and Paul, and they all but shooed me away.

The End

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