"Ooo it looks real posh Kev, wishin I done me air nah."
"It'ud take yer a while if yer did! Mind you it seems ta be comin orf a bit. Yer moultin babe."
"Bloody good job n all! Maybe iss jes tempry."
"Gawd I ope so. We'll find aht, don't yer worry Trace. Those sods!"
"Hexcuse me, but those are certainleah hexcellent costumes!"
"Fanks mate, yours is naff innit!"
"Yeh, fuckin naff!"
"Hwhy thank hew! Mai naime is Edmund Smythe-Smythe. Quite han event isn't it! Hall hwalks of life. Have hew hattended befaw?"
"E means as we bin ere before Kev. Nah, firs time mate."
"The meh has put on quite a spwead ai hear. Hexcellent hidea to make hit faceah dress this hyear don't hew think?"
"Wot the bleedin ell is a meh?"
"E means the mayor I reckon Kev. Yer gotta learn ah ta talk posh like."
"Hwheah did yew pewchase yaw costumes? Ai shall have to patronize them! Thews teeth look vereah real!"
"Wass that card yer got? Trace yer ax im."
"Hexcewse me mistah but what's this ere card hew gort?"
"Hwhy it's mai hinvitation."
"Yer need oner them do yer?"
"Ho mai yersaaaaaaaaaaaargh!"
"Well we's got an invitation at least. Fuckin ell though, e's a mess aint e!"
"Aw ferget im, posh git! Less go find em bastards wot did vis to us an sort em aht!"