Two Chavs in a ParkMature

"You alright mate? You look kind uv pale."

"Got turned into a bleedin vampire lars night dint I! Stands ta reason I looks pale."

"Shii-it. Wassit like?"

"Sa bitch innit. No one axed me if I wanned to be a bloody vampire!"

"Owd it appen? You're kiddin me right?"

"Dunno. I remember sayin 'night' to ya, nex thin I wakes up on a slab wiv this dusty geezer starin at me."

"What, did e start sumfin?"

"Nah, e jus tole me I shoulda run faster like. Spoutin crap bout evolvin."


"Yeah, you know. Like dinosaurs n that."

"Shii -it man, what a tosser!"

"You got that right."

"Less go ome Kev. My fingers n toes is nearly froze off."

"Can't feel the cold no more. Can't feel anythin. Wass the point eh?"

"Whered e get ya, this soddin vampire?"

"Right on the neck. See? Kills like when I ad that impacted toof."

"Fuck yeah, I see it! You looked in a mirror mate?"

"Got no reflection innit. Wassit look like?"

"Like you bin stabbed wiv a fork."

"Pass us that voddy. Maybe if I drink enough I'll wake up normal. So, we havin fun yet?"

"Gotta go ome mate, sorry."

"Oh right, night then Dave."




Just a bit of fun. Not serious stuff.



The End

46 comments about this story Feed