The Story 1Mature

“How did that make you feel, to see the fear in her eyes?”
“It felt...Thrilling. I could feel the adrenaline coursing through my veins, the energy and excitement it gave. I felt alive.”
“Do you feel alive now?”
“No. I feel like I’m floating in space, wandering aimlessly. Lost. I don’t feel well doc. I feel like it is impossible to be alive again.”
“When was the last time you felt alive? Before you met her.”
“Five years ago. I felt good and alive, I felt like I had purpose.”
“What happened to change that?”
“I’m not sure.  Well… That’s a lie. I do know. I know exactly what changed it, and I know why. I knew that I shouldn’t do it, but I was curious.”
“Being curious about things isn’t bad, it is natural.”
“I know that, I am not stupid. But I should not have taken the path that I did. I should have done it the right way. I shouldn’t have tried to learn for myself. But it’s hard, you know? Not teaching myself. That’s how I grew up, you know. I taught myself everything, always searching for more knowledge. I never relied on anyone else. I didn’t need them. Not that I could have asked anyone, of course. You have to have friends before you can talk to them.”
“Do you feel like you don’t have friends?”
“Oh come on doc, you’re not stupid either. I don’t ‘feel’ like I don’t have friends, it is something that I know to be a cold truth.”
“Well there’s your parents, you could talk to them. They care about you, and want what’s best for you.”
“Oh would you lay off it? I told you already that I am not dumb. I know that my parents care, and I know that they could be my friends. But they aren’t good enough. No one is good enough, not for me. They don’t deserve to be my friends, they are all dumb and stupid, to narrow minded to understand what I say, or even to pretend they do.”
“Who do you mean by ‘they’?”
“Humans. All of you, you’re all too narrow minded and selfish. Even the good ones aren’t good enough, they think of themselves before others, no matter how good they are. None of you are truly selfless, none that I know at least. None of you are smart enough to see what I need, none are brave enough to try to break the mold and make a change. Bunch of sissies.”

The End

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