I’m a bitch for giving up on you, I’m selfish for taking me away from you, but I’m tired of tears eating at the inside. I’m tired of hating my best friend. I’m tired of wanting to fall apart, and being the victom, and clenching inward with pain as I double over with tears. I’m done.
I thought about walking away, and my heart sinks as I think about giving up on you. I could never to that, I’ll stay with you by your side. I’d do anything for you. But im finding the strength to build myself again. I ‘m growing me again, and I need time to find me without you. I am looking for the strength, and reassurance to walk away to make tihngs better.
I hope you know what you’re going to miss.
I hate that you don’t call. I hate the feeling of being left behind every time I see you or her. I hate crying over and over again to get out a pain that isn’t leaving, and I hate all the self hatred as I turn into the evil acharctor and pine after you. I’m tired of all this, I’m tired of wanted you to run to me, tell me you know what we have is greater than anything you will ever find elsewhere and tell me you were insecure and hurting to leave, and you wanted me to feel it back. Because then I could tell you you mean the world to me, and I savor our moments. I could tell you you make me smile through my tears, and you are always on my mind. You would be told you are most than my best friend, and you would be given the world, with me in it. I could tell you all the best parts of us without the guilt of hurting her, or the fear of driving you away with desperate passion. But you don’t want it. You don’t care about my love anymore, you’ve found your own.