16. A Family Divided [III]


Once again the night bore right into Phillip. He stared into the darkening sky, thinking about his life, and what would be his death, especially if things carried on in the way they had been. Pain, anger, fury, desire… Everything overwhelmed him, but it was, he knew, too late to take back anything. Too late to say sorry.

Ironically, hunger nibbled at his insides, and his stomach wished that Phillip had not left before taking any nutrition. He dared not admit it though, and, fortunately, the fatigue inside Phillip overtook all of the hunger’s power, and let his mind fixate itself on Aidelle, and the lack of her.

For him, staring into that deep night sky had a soothing, calming effect, and ever so often he felt his stubborn head be pulled down.

Phillip tore his gaze away from the tempting sky and, looking round the attic, slumped himself down against the wall behind him. Phillip felt the fatigue tug on his eyelids, telling him to let go and close them, like mechanical doors, and to let sleep’s warm embrace keep him safe, but Phillip could not bare forgetting why he was so full of mixed up emotions. With a grunt, he jerked himself awake again, and continued to think of his splendid love.

Aidelle… And the time that he had lost her.

There were other times as well, of course, happy times, days and nights filled with love, events that Phillip was unlikely to forget throughout whatever was left of his now-meagre life, and would remember right into eternity.

As his eyelids shut once more, images flashed and fluttered past. They were of Aidelle.

The first time Phillip had met her: he had been reluctant to look to his family ‘suggestion’ of mate, but when his eyes had glimpsed the figure walking through the park, he knew that their relationship was cemented for certain. Even though her dark hair had been blown to and fro by the autumn wind, and her big brown eyes were full of worry as the sky began to threaten rain to ruin their meeting, Phillip could not help but know that he was attracted to her. And her heart had been as wonderful too, like Aidelle was the perfect match for him.

 Phillip remembered her mother, the chaperone, elderly but kind, and willing to give her last daughter away. There were no mistakes made and no regrets felt between either side. Mother and daughter looked nothing alike, and the latter captivated Phillip with her intelligence, the way she held herself and her laugh.

Of course, there had been the guessed attraction and chemistry but it was, in no way, love at first sight; Phillip didn’t believe in such a fairytale. No, the romance they had took time to blossom…yet it was with time that it had shriveled away.

It had rained that day and, walking through the park, Phillip and his new friend had been forced to take cover from the storm in the nearest gazebo, which wasn’t very near at all. Even soaked, Aidelle was bubbly, and she still looked rather pretty. The gazebo had buzzed with adrenalin as lightening flashed overhead. It had been a dark afternoon, but, underneath the wooden roof, it had been safe and warm and so full of Aidelle’s light.

Phillip’s mind was so full of those happy memories; any bad memories had been pushed away and lost in the torrent of the love that had come from their successful courtship.

Cradled in the security of his mind, Phillip wrapped his arms up across his stomach and settled right down onto the floor. Having turned, he could no longer see the garden outside, but the dash of sky that he could see through the top window brought him more comfort of being close with Aidelle.

Phillip sighed. It was okay to be without her, was it?

He would never get used to that, even if there became a glimmer of hope.


The End

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