Twelve years experience as a professional hit-man, and one hundred and twenty seven kills to my name. You would think that by now i was used to seeing dead bodies. Thats what i thought until last night.
In all my time as a hit-man i have never had a problem like last night, and I've had a lot of problems. I have had people that are so stubborn they just wont die, I've had people walk in half way through a job. I've forgotten the tools of my trade(more than once), I've even got the wrong guy on one occasion. My first year i even shot a guy eight times and left him for dead, just to find out that he survived. i had to finish him of whilst he was in the hospital. But last night that really was something else, I've never seen anything like it and i don't want to anytime soon.
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It's a shame its just the two of us adding posts, i think if other people were to get involved the story has a lot of potential. not that im displeased with the direction its taken."
Can I follow? - give me a few hours and I'll add"
his neighbour heard a noise,
its a half naked child Hobart was abusing"
Mostly, I think grammar is hard to learn in an academic way. The best way is to read an awful lot, and examine the way writers put things as you read, thinking about how and why they've written it like that. It gets easier with practice. I try to do this myself.
Not sure I could correct an entire book (don't have the skills required) - although lots here will offer pointers.
Like lots of people I'm time poor. Unfortunately not cash rich tho lol.
Thanks bfd :D"
But ideas and plot great - interesting and I'm enjoying reading it :D"