There was a battle going on inside of me. One half wanted to bolt this crazy mess that my life had turned into, to just run back to Beverly Hills where my life was far simpler than I had orignally thought it to be. The other was curious and contemplating what this new turn in my life would mean. So far it had been torturous, with the loss of a friend and Damian as a pain in my butt. But the so called 'magic' that I possessed made me curious to know what I was capable of.
But so far, I was hating it. The vision of Helena's blank sapphire eyes was imprinted into my mind like a reminder of the great sin I had done. I'd brought on her death, something that shouldn't have happened. I didn't even know her, she was nothing but a stranger. A stranger that had protected me and saved my life.
I wasn't only grateful, but I was scared. This was only just the beginning, what more would await?
The sound of the door opening distracted me from the thoughts I'd plunged into. I avoided having a converstion with Damian, who I knew would only infuriate me. But I hadn't realized that using my mind as a distraction would really have pulled me in more than I'd thought.
Looking up, my eyes met the familiar green ones of Jayden as he gave Damian and I a tired smile. He'd managed to whip something up in the attached kitchen of the suite we'd be staying in for the night, as he walked towards us with plates in hand. He handed me one as well as Damian one, before leaving again to get the food and set up the table.
Within a few minutes, we were all sat around the small, rounded table, digging into our dinners. I didn't have much of an appetite as I merely picked at my potatoes, taking a small bite out of my fried rice before repeating it all again. I stayed quiet throughout dinner before finally deciding to retreat to my room. I felt exhausted but that wasn't the reason for my actions.
I needed time to absorb all that had happened, and I wanted to be alone. So I thanked Jayden for the dinner, who watched me with concerned eyes as I left the room, going to bed.
The moment my head hit the pillow, consciousness faded away. But the reality of what had happened still clung to me.
Tears. Blood curling screams. Then darkness.
I felt my hands shake by my sides as I moved towards the small glimmer of light slowly, dreading what I was about to see. I had a feeling that I knew it, this all felt familiar.
Stepping out into the light, my eyes moved to meet the image of Helena, body resting on the ground as the thickness of the blood around her grew.
It was a hopeless cry. Her eyes met mine for the shortest second before fading away, the life sucked out of her as she took one last shuddering breath. The light disappeared completely from her eyes as they watched me, unmoving, not real.
Sobs shook me as I crept back into the darkness. I slammed my back against a wall as the tears were released. I had killed her. It was all my fault.
I am the murderer.