A FeelingMature

Chapter 2 - A Feeling

It’s weird not having to wear a uniform, so the next morning when I shut the front door behind me and walked out towards Chris’ BMW I felt slightly self-conscious. I was only wearing the normal type of stuff I used to wear back home, blue jeans, trainers and a black V-necked stretch cotton T-Shirt, but I still wasn’t used to wearing stuff this casual, at school in England us sixth formers still had to wear like black pants. It was in vain though because when I got into the back seat of the car Karen turned around and said, “Hi Beth, that top looks really nice on you.” I put my seat belt on as Chris started the car and said, “Thanks Karen, and thanks again for the lift Chris.”

“It’s okay.” He replied as he pulled out of his parking space and out onto road to school.

“I think I’m either gonna get Jake or Gray to teach you how to drive.” Karen wondered idally.

“You really don’t have to get any of them to teach me how to drive you know, I’ll just get my dad to.”

“No, I’ll get one of the guys to, you can meet them when we get to school, I was just trying decide who to ask, I know Jake or Chris would, I think Gray would too, Bob and Darren might be I bit iffy about it being seniers, not cool enough for them, plus Tate and Larry can’t drive yet since there both freshman.”

I think Karen was pondering out loud but I wasn’t really sure so I just looked out the window at the passing buildings, there were cars pulling out of drive ways everywhere, proberly students like us driving to school. I think I’m quite looking forward to learning to drive, I never really thought about it in England but it would be good not to have to depend on other people to take me places. I would be sort of free to go where I wanted and not worry about trying to get a lift home, that would be fun.

We drove to school in a comfortable silence and arrived about ten minutes before school started. I grabbed my bag and got out of the car and me, Karen and Chris headed towards a bench under this massive tree, I guessed it was where they hang out because there were a six guys that looked a bit like Chris standing and sitting around the tree. One of them was even sitting on one of it’s massive lower branches watching our approach, I noticed something before I even reached them though, they all had be the same height as Chris, all of them looked well over six foot and to old to be in high school.

“Right,” Karen said, “time to introduce you to everyone. Right you guys, this is Beth, she just moved here from England so I expect you to all be on your best behaviour and be nice. Okay.” There were a few nods there attention still focused on me, I didn’t perticually enjoy being stared at but I didn’t mind to much so I just waved once and stood there looking like a fool. “That’s Darren Queg, sitting with his back on the tree facing us,” Karen pointed and he said “Hey”. Karen continued to introduce five other guys.

“The three guys squished on the park bench under the tree,” I nodded and as she introduced them she pointed in turn, “The one in the middle is Jake Bokem, my boyfriend, on his left is Tate Kelley and on his right is Larry Tonnette.” I waved at all three of them seperatly and Karen carried on introducing the last two guys, the one standing leaning against the tree next to Darren and the one in the tree. “That one next to Darren,” I nodded trying not to smirk at she referred to him as `that’, “ he’s called Bob Hasselm, and the dude in tree,” she pointed upwards and looked at the the guy, he was smiling down at us with a strange look on his face, thoughtful but extreme concentration at the same time. “That’s Gray Ledger.”

“Hi,” Gray Ledger said.

“Alreet?” I asked, Gray Ledger narrowed his eyes at me.

“What does that mean?” he asked, Americans can really be stupid sometimes.

“It means ‘are you okay?’, ‘how are you’, ‘hello’,” I relised just then that although I thought he was being stupid, it was because he was American that he didn’t know what it would mean, it was northern slang for Christ’s sake. “Sorry,” I chastised myself, “it’s what we say in England, I forgot that you wouldn’t know what I meant.”

“It’s okay, no harm done. So, you’re the elusive Beth Johnson ey?” he said

“Elusive?” I was a tad confused by this.

“Chris wouldn’t shut up about you last night.” he was grinning like a maniac, he was clearly enjoying himself.

“Oh.” It was all I could think of saying, it was all I could really say because the bell went then and it turned out that Jake was in my first class so we walked there together and he sat next to me, another lesson on A Midsummer Nights Dream, I’d already done most of the research at my old school so it gave me time to think about the people who I had just met.

They all had simeralities of there skin and hair for instance, there hair black as night and there skin all the same shade of slightly off cream, there eye’s though they were all different colours and there cheek bones all seemed to be placed in different places on their face or set at different angles making there faces look different but strongly startingly alike at the same time. There lips were all pretty full but they never looked to big for any of the faces, and then there was obviously the height thing, I had a suspision that if this school has a basketball team then all seven were on it.

Most of the day past in another blur I was anticipating lunch so it oviously came quickly. Turns out that Gray’s in my Maths class so I sat next to him in that, we didn’t really talk much, but I took in his feature’s anyway. His nose was slightly crooked, broken and not set properly proberly, brown eye’s but I didn’t get to look into them to tell what shade they were, his hair was black like all of them and his was messy, just messy, not stylishly though like the in-look was at the moment, it was just messy because that was how it was. One of the things I did ask him was how tall he was, he’s 6 foot 7 and half, I feel like a proper midget, I’m 5 foot 5, Karen’s 5 foot 10. I still don’t know what Economics is but Jake, Karen and Gray were in that class too and I ended up sitting next to Gray again as Jake and Karen were sitting next to each other. Band was good, I sang and Karen drummed, it was a pretty good lesson, at the end of it though my stomach flipped, time to face lunch.

Me and Karen went to the lunch room and bought lunch, I didn’t feel much like eating but a bought a quarter of a pizza and an orange, and we headed towards a table at the end of the hall by one of it’s massive windows. The guys were already there when we finally got to the table, it’s a very big hall, they all had massive trays of food, I wasn’t really surprised though by the size of them. It was a table that would have normally heald around twelve people but with there height and broadness added together me and Karen barely had room to squeeze on either side of the table. Everyone was talking to each other, talking about lessons, music, sport, I didn’t join in I just sat and ate and listened, trying to find out information about the people sitting around me. I was pretty aware that most of the guys kept shooting interested glanced my way.

I had finished my pizza and was busy peeling my orange when some blond girl came up and stood behind Karen and looked at me, the boys all fell silent immediately. I could guess why, this was the school bitch, the one everybody loved but really hated at the same time. “Hi, I’m Dafny Beatie, and I’m offering you a place at my table, after all why would you want to sit with these rejects?”

“Why would I want to sit with you?” I looked her deliberately up and down, taking in the face caked with make up and the clothes that cost so much that they could keep a small African village a float for a year.

“Because like, why wouldn’t you want to?” her voice was very nasel

“The question was rhetorical,” a puzzled expression crosed her face, she must be as thick as pig shit, I sighed and explained, “if I wanted to sit with you, then I would have, and now I certainly am not since you called my friends rejects and you probabely have an IQ less then the strings on a guitar and since I only like decent conversation about proper issues all I have to say to you is,” I raised my left hand and waved, “bye bye now.” The prise bitch then stormed of in what looked to be a horrible mood.

“That was excellent,” Gray cried.

“Thanks, it was nothing seriously, no one should get a way with being a down right cow.”

“Still cool though,” Chris said, “No one ever talks like that to Daphney, you are like so amazing,” as he said the last part of the sentence I noticed that his voice did actually sound slightly awed, and there was this look in his eyes, it made me feel uncomfortable so I looked away, down at my food.

The rest of lunch went on like that, everyone saying that it was proper cool what I’d said to Daphney, some people even came up and asked me if I could shake there hand, weird I know. I think it’s an American thing. I think that one moment kinda broke the ice with everyone in pretty much the school, well everyone except the cheerleaders, Daohney must be one. People were saying hello in the hall as a passed, some even wanted me to sit next to them in class and everybody wanted to be my partner in P.E. Most of the time I stuck with Karen or Gray, God, Gray id just so damn big, he’s not the tallest, but he’s the most musley and has the broadest shoulders.

At the end of the day, I got a lift to the stables with Chris and Karen and Gray came along to, I don’t know why Gray came but it was cool to sit next to him in the back of the car, to be close to someone so big and powerful, I felt safe. I barely new him but he made feel so comfortable, made me feel that America could one day be my home.

When we got to the horses, we got them in and of course Darcy being Darcy, she had roled in the biggest patch of mud you could find in the field so I gave her a shower, Gray and Chris wanted to help of course, so I let them. We ended up having a massive hose fight, me, Chris, Gray and Karen because there were two hoses. We all ended up soking wet and Chris wouldn’t let us get back into the car, even he wouldn’t get into it because he “didn’t want to damage the seats”, so we went and sat on the ledge in Darcys stable, I was jammed between Chirs and Gray, there so damn big. I felt something strange, it was nice being this close to Grey, I don’t know why I felt it, it was a funny feeling, like there was something flying around in my stomach. I wasn’t particularly pleasant.

“So,” Karen said, we were all shivering, and Darcy was just looking at us with a funny expression on her face when ever she lifted her head from her food, “which one of you is going to teach Beth to drive?”

“It’s okay, I’ll just my get dad to,” I said quickly.

“Noncence Beth,” Gray said, “I’ll teach you.”

“Really?” I asked, he nodded, “well, thank I suppose.” Chris gave Gray a murderous look and we sat in silence from then on, just listening to the sound of Darcy chewing on her hay.

Eventually, when Chris deamed us dry enough, we went back to his car and they drove me home. On the way back Gray asked me, “So what type of music are you into?”

“Rock, a bit of metal and I like load of Blues music.” I replied.

“Huh,” he said, “I never really had you as a bluesy type of person.”

“So what type of music do you like?” I asked back.

“Me, I’m way into country, at the moment Taylor Swift is rocking my socks,” strangly, as he said this I felt a pang of something, why can’t I rock his socks.

“I never had you guy as a country kind of guy either,” I said, trying to hide what I was feeling, that pang of something was still there, I really couldn’t put my finger on what it was.

When we got to my house I looked at the clock in the dashboard, and I got slowly out of the car, it was half past six, I wasn’t late for dinner thank God. The last time I was late for diner my mam flipped, I don’t even no why she flipped, what was wrong with being late for dinner. “See you tomorrow,” Gray said.

“Yeah,” I said, then I said to Karen, “you don’t have to come and pick me up in the morning.”

“Don’t be stupid, of course we’ll come and pick you up in the morning, it’s what friends do.”

“Thanks,” I said while getting out of the car and onto the pavement (or the “sidewalk”, as they say here, weird I know), I waved as Chris drove away, I didn’t want Gray to go away.

I unlocked the yale lock on the door with my key and walked into the house, I hung my coat up and then the smell of pasta bake hit me, my mouth started to water, it watered badly. Mam is a great cook and it didn’t surpirse me when she caught me try to get the pasta bake out the oven, what can I say, I was hungry. Mam had caught me doing this many times before, she new that I would, she expected, it was even like she had a 6th sence to tell he when I was going to try steal some. No matter how quiet I was, no matter how hard I tried, she always new, it was quite scary sometimes.

Mam stod in the open door of the kitchean and raised an eyebrow, I put the pasta bake back in the oven. “Go get changed,” she said, “You smell like horse,” she paused and breathed in through her nose deeply, then she said, “you smell of man?” She said it like a question.

“I smell of what?” I asked, what the hell was she on about.

“You smell like man. Beth…what have you been doing?”

“We went and did the horses then I got a lift back off Chris, Karen and Gray, nothing strange went on. What do you mean I smell like man.”

“You smell like man, like you’ve been close to a guy who really likes you, can’t you smell it. It must be pretty strong if I can smell it over here.”

“Mother, what are you on about!”

“The smell of man dear, havn’t I explained this before,” I gave her a blank look, she sighed, “obviously not. The smell of a man is something only a women can smell, and it makes you feel good. Beth it turns you on. In the car which guys were you with?”

“Chris and Gray, why?

“Were you sitting in the back with one of them?”

“Yeah, Grey.”

“Then this Grey character, you may not like him, yet, but your body is telling you you do.”

“Mother, what are you on about!” I was seriously exasperated.

“Go on the internet and type into a search engine the smell of man, you’ll see what I mean, I shouldn’t actually be able to smell, but I can. It smells kind of like your father does.”


“Go on, go look at it on the internet. I’ll call you down when dinners ready,” and she went back into the living room.

I was thinking about what she was saying, I mean, she sounded like a nutter but she did have a point. There was something in the car that seemed to come with being around Grey that I couldn’t out my finger on.

When I got to my room I had a shower before I did anything, after all, I did smell of horse, so when I was clean and was wearing my sweats and strappy top I turned on my laptop and sat on my bed with it. It didn’t take very long to load so when it was finally working I clicked on the internet and typed into the search engine bar at the top of the screen the smell of man. Not many results came up but I clicked on the first one and I had a read. It said

To the girls out there who don’t think that there’s a way of finding that one guy, think again, all you have to do is have a smell.

You see girls there is a scientific study identifying that we can smell when a guy likes you likes or when he’s aroused. Whether it’s the twinkle in his eye, the swagger in his step or the smell of his sweat. Sound disgusting I know, but really it can smell pretty nice if you’ve got the right guy. the one, all you have to do is to get close enough to get a wiff. You should even be able to smell over any cologne he may be wearing, so just ask for a hug and voila, it could be true love.

I finished reading the article and I leaned back and reated my head against my head board, it kinda made sence but it also seemed pretty stupid at the same time. I mean, how can you smell man, it would be like saying a cat smells not like a cat, or something like that. Okay, I admit, that was a really crap comparison.

Mam called me down for dinner as I was about to log onto an IM account that I had set up the night before, I already had loads of peoples adies. Dinner was great, mam’s cooking was excellent, although she did keep looking at me funny and Dad talked about work.

I escaped as soon as possible, mam was really looking at me weird. I practically bolted up the stairs and once I was in my room I sank onto my bed and logged into my IM account. Straight away a box popped up with a message from Gray saying “Hey there.”

My stomach twisted and instantly I new what the strange feeling was; I liked Gray Ledger, a lot.

I think Chris likes her, he definitely does, the way he looks at her, I know that it’s not a crime to like someone but it makes my skin crawl and it gives me the urge to punch him in the face. I don’t know why, she’s just a friend but I keep getting this feeling, it’s not particularly nice.

She’s such a strong person though, the way she cut down Dahney’s rampage, it was amazing. She has a sharp tongue and an even sharper mind, she is amazing. When I got to sit next to her in the back of the car aswell, it was intoxicating to be close to some one with such presence.

Grey Ledger

What she did today, it was amazing, the way she stood up to Daphney, the way she held herself while she did it, the way her voice shounded while sshe did it, clipped, cold and hard, it was amazing. She captured my attention immediately, as soon as I saw her this morning, I new that she would be a welcome change in the school, that she would cause a shift in the tender balance of this school. I can’t wait for when it all kicks of, I know that she’ll be able to handle herself perfectly.

Chris is blatently in love with her, we went running and I could see it, he wasn’t very good at hiding it, its colours his thoughts like the plague, all yellow and white, it’s blinding, I can hide it though. Mind you, it’s hard, I can’t stop thinking about her, it’s intoxicating. I wanted to hold her hand in the back of the car, to put my arm around her when we were all sitting in the stable, wanted to give her a hug when she had out Daphney down.

There is supposed to be a thing called love at first sight, I never did believe it, now though…I do.

Grey Ledger

So to know if that guys,

Good luck girls!

The End

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