This is my life yay me
Hi my name is James Smittity I’m a insane actor on broadway street. I have a cheap crummy apartment that I share with my Mother. I’m only insane because of the women that I just told you about. She drives me nuts with this and that, when and where blah blah blah blee blah. I wish I could move but I can’t because she expects me to bring her with me, well i’m not as soon as I have enough money i’m out. This story may be called the wondrous life of me but my life is not all rainbows and cakes. Its more of a brocolli and rancid cheese kind of deal. So just go ahead and change the name of this book to The little James that couldn’t…….. get rid of his Mom. My Mom may be more insane than me because she thinks we live in some mansion of some sort. She is always going over to the apartment next door, and fires some random lady who she thinks is a maid. But then she always forgets the next day.
But hey she could go over to the apartment infront of ours and fire the 30 year old dude who she pays to go get groceries for her. My Mom ha listen to me saying my Mom like a 2 year old. Anyway she likes to act like she got them but I know that she didn’t. I bet you are thinking that I’m a perfectly normal person and I’m perfectly normal. But would a perfectly “normal" person go to jail for public urination, but hey it wasn’t my fault that the bathroom was so dirty that I couldn’t see the toilet. There was also the fact that I was partially blind from being pepper-sprayed in the face by a old lady. But that a story for another time, by that I mean a story for now. The old lady drops a dollar bill I bent over to pick it up and she thought I was a thief and then boom pepper spray. I’m surprised they still make that stuff, because I heard that they banned it in 47 states. I just so happened to be in one of the ones that still allowed it. So anyway I’m in jail now ,so yeah thats new. I like my new roommate, sure he beats me up every night but it's still better than living with my Mom. So maybe my life will become The wondrous life of James Smittity, in about 5 years when I get out.