I sounded bitter in that last page; well, in all of my past pages. I guess everybody in their own time is bitter. It seems bitterness cannot be escaped, nor can the war raged by it be easily won. It's like someone you can't escape or change, someone who wants all of your attention, all of your energy. It's hard to change what you've grown so used to doing, over and over again.
Bitterness is something I'm slowly banishing from my body, not by myself, but I'm still banishing it. Have you ever been writing and you just feel this rhythm flowing from your fingertips and onto the key board? When you are just writing one sentence and the next comes to you? I feel that when I'm especially inspired to write something made up or real. It's like this funny sensation that rushes in my blood.
I love that feeling. The feeling of complete abandonment, yet a feeling of complete wholeness. It's something hard to describe and so easy to feel. It's like that moment when you're sitting in a room full of people you love and somebody laughs or does something funny and everybody laughs together and you get this warm feeling in your heart. That's what I love.