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Revelation

"George," the old man said. "George!"

George turned his head sharply and looked at him. "Sorry," he said. "I seem to have drifted off there for a minute."

"You have to keep your concentration, George," the old man said. "If you don't stay focussed, who knows what you might conjure up? You have a vivid imagination, you know."

George shook his head. "Wow. That was weird. For a minute there, all these strange images were running through my head." He paused. "And for some reason, I thought that I had big ears and a forgettable face. And I was some kind of god. The keeper of the word, or something strange like that."

The old man chuckled. "Well, insofar as you use words to create things, then that's as good a description as any. But don't let it go to your head. And that whole "forgettable face" thing, that was just your low self-esteem cropping up. I wouldn't worry about it. Just stay focussed."

George nodded. "So, you were going to explain some things to me."

"Well," the man said, "I'm going to ask you some questions. Your answers will be more revealing than any explanation I could give you."

George sighed. He hadn't realized this was going to be so trying.

"All right," he said. "If that's the way you have to do it."

The old man shifted his position and got comfortable.

"All right, then. To start with, who am I?"

"Who are you?" George frowned. "What do you mean?"

"Exactly that. Who am I?"

"Well, you're the old man I conjured up for that story that I never wrote."

The old man smiled. "Go on."

George struggled to recall the details. "Uh... you were supposed to be some kind of traveler, I think. Someone from... um... an alternate future. Yeah. That was it."

"Good. But who am I?"

George squinted. "I don't know what you mean. I don't think I had a name for you yet, just this whole alternate thing that I wanted to do. I had an idea what you looked like. I modeled you after--"

George stopped dead in his throught-tracks.

The old man smiled. "Now you're getting somewhere."

George let out a long breath. "I based you on me."

The old man nodded.

"You're an alternate-future version of myself."

"Bingo."

George leaned forward and squinted at the old man. Beneath the wrinkles, the resemblance was uncanny. He hadn't noticed it before.

He put his hand to his head.

Oh, boy.

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32 COMMENTS ABOUT THIS STORY RSS

Just Chatting
somebodysomeday83 "You definitely should! ;)"
Just Chatting
Faltarego "Well, then... I suppose I should get off my backside and finish those three novels I have about half-done.

All together now: "Slacker!"
"
Just Chatting
Writers_Block "Hrm, very 'Secret Window, Secret Garden' of you. Except without Stephen King's rush to instant gore and throw backs to previous occasions that have nonsensical plots in the story. I was never a fan of 'Four Past Midnight', but then again short stories bug the hell out of me.

Anyways now I'm going off on a tangent. Very well written, you put a lot of effort into your craft. I wish I cared as much as you when writing on this site, but to me all this is just a game to hone my skills.

When it comes to real writing, I always edit the draft at least ten times before letting anyone....tangent again.

Great story, I'll post a branch when I get a chance, and don't worry I will care a little.
"
Just Chatting
JJ1979 "I've got to agree with Stanley - I mean Seldom - on this one: I thought your work was publishable as soon as I read it. And I don't mean merely publishable in second-rate martial-arts magazines!"
Just Chatting
Faltarego "Well, all I can is... after a long hiatus (translation: failing to get my ass in gear and just write, dammit!) it's good to know that the skill hasn't completely deserted me. I'm one of those people who is devilishly good at starting things but sorely lacking in the ability to sustain and finish. Oh, those mood swings!! I think this site is just the thing for me. Feedback and collaboration will keep me coming back. And writing! Dammit!"
Just Chatting
seldom "Yeah,

Agree writing is fantastic. It sort of reminds me a bit of Tom Holt - only better to be honest. Don't know why youre still here Fal because everything you've donme so far is publishable. If you've been sending it off then you've been really unlucky. And if not why not!!!
I know about this, I worked in the book industry for a couple of years.
:)
"
Just Chatting
somebodysomeday83 "I have to agree with Pinch on this one, it could definitely be cut-down-in-size. However, I'm guessing that this is because you felt-the-need to get your next installment written quickly? This said because you're first two chapters were practically-flawless. I'm sure given the opportunity and time, you would have edited it to your usual standards. Right? Still, like where you're taking it. Also how you incorportated the previous two branches :)"
Just Chatting
Caesar "Guilty as charged.
Although it was my intention to accelerate it to make the character seem desperate enough to do what he did.

Still fairly new to writing, so bear with me and please, don't hesitate to criticize my stories/branches/chapters in detail. It helps me tremendously.

Thanks Pinch :)
"
Just Chatting
Faltarego "Thank you, good doctor. It's been a postmodern kinda day. I read one of JJ1979's pieces earlier, and it had a couple of characters talking postmodernism and humanism in a bar. And then here you come with your comment! So, needless to say, I've been reading up on postmodernism. There are certainly a lot of writers I like that fall into that category.

I appreciated the feedback. Thanks again.
"
Just Chatting
DrPinch "Postmodern and intriguing - haven't moved on to the other chapters yet, but already worth a five for some very efficient writing."
Just Chatting
Caesar "Inspiring. Suspense and anticipation take hold after every chapter.

Please continue, Fal, and I'll try to get into your mindset to write another chapter too.
"
Just Chatting
seldom "fantastic - carry on! i wanna know!"
Just Chatting
seldom "Hey,

Love the intrusion of the weird into the everyday setting. Great characters being built up too.

:) Intriguing definitley
"
Just Chatting
Faltarego "Well, I'm certainly gratified that people are enjoying this. Many thanks for the comment!"
Just Chatting
JJ1979 "Love it. Very drole; 'Office Space' meets Margaret Atwood!"
Just Chatting
Faltarego "Wow. I'm glad you're enjoying it. That's one of the reasons I decided to try out this site. I thought that, if I could write some stuff and get actual feedback from people, it might prompt me to actually continue writing (momentum being something I have trouble sustaining most times).

There will be more!
"
Just Chatting
somebodysomeday83 "You can't do this to me. You must do a follow-up. The pace is wonderful as is the suspense. I'm wondering where this is going to go? Has George, bored with the monotony of office life, of Monday mornings, day-dreamed the whole thing up? Has he nodded off at his desk? Is it a practical joke? Or has he recently been through a tough time, and his colleages are simply humouring him? Perhaps he's had an accident and it's affected him in some way. I wonder this, because of how you re-iterated the sequence of disbelief: denial, confusion... and then acceptance. Was it really acceptance, or simply a case of humoring him?

I've book marked the page, and look forward to your next installment :)
"
Just Chatting
Faltarego "Thanks for the feedback! I've managed to post another chapter, and I think one more will get me where I want to go."
Just Chatting
somebodysomeday83 "Great. I hope you post it before somebody else beats you to it! I'm liking your style. A piece which any nine-while-fiver, and indeed writer, can easily relate to. I particularly like your interaction between characters. Well-written :)"
Just Chatting
Faltarego "Thanks! Yes, I definitely have more. My first chapter was originally going to have more in it, but it was getting long, so I split it up. I thought I'd let it sit for a couple of days, just in case anyone decided to do something with it. I'm actually hoping to get the story to a certain point before others start to run with it."
Just Chatting
somebodysomeday83 "I like your style, will you be adding another chapter?"
Just Chatting
Faltarego "Thanks for the comment!! It's an idea I've had in my head for a while now, and after I found this site, I decided to do something with it. Also thought I'd poke fun at the whole "writers writing about writers" thing. It seems that at least half my stories have writers as the main character. I guess it's a case of ... "write what you know." Taken to the exteme, of course."
Just Chatting
Rac7hel "I just got finished reading two other stories, both of which had writers as main characters. As soon as you said George was a writer I was like "Man, writers love writing about writers!" Anyway I like the story so far. :)"

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