(Originally posted by Rodge the Linkbot on Sat Jan 02, 2010)
So far today I've had a mob come after me, almost got arrested, walked through a sewer, choked, and now probably going to die. Today SUCKS.
Click slowed to a walk. Oh, and now I'm going to do it alone. Yay being alone. At least no one will see me cry for mercy. Click turned a corner.
"Eh-hehehehehehehehe." Wessel's shoulders slumped as he hunched over, "Eh-hehehehehehehe." He helded up a very odd looking crossbow. "Ze betrayed me, all I did was follow zat man, did what I did so ze wouldn't wipe out zis kingdom... Then ze leaves. Ze jus' leaves me here, to fight for my life."
Wessel turned, "AND YOU!!" Click guarded himself with his shield as two arrows were fired at him. He felt both arrows hit his sheild before falling to the ground. "You zet them out. Things were going so vell for me. Vor cis kingdom. I wus going to permanently keep zis place out of the war. But no, the King had to have you people come!!"
A few more shots flew at him, each deflecting off his shield, "In my defense I really didn't want to come... it was those people I was living with's idea. I just came because a lot of them were hot and I really like hot women."
"ZILENCE!!!" Wessel screamed, "Don't give me zose escuzes, you are ze the great and legendary Click!! The one who'll bring Zeranad'z head on platter!"
"Actually, I said pike." Click corrected, "If you're going to taunt me before killing me, get it right. Or not, if you, you know, don't kill me. Please don't kill me."
Wessel laughed with another burrage of arrows, Click blocking each of them.
"Zid d'you really think I would let you live? You vuined it all for me, I just wanted to save Escartez, but no! You came, and you have wuined that! You will die!"
"Can't I just, I don't know, pay you off, or maybe buy you some lager? I know a great bar!" Like that's going to happen. Click blocked a few more arrows.
How do I get myself into this stuff? Or, better yet, how can I get out of it? Click heard Fujitsu grunt in the distance. Fujitsu doesn't think like that, he blocked a sword with his bare hands, for you. He fought Xeranad head on, and now, after getting stabbed, he's still fighting. He even fell for your do-good story, not because he's so stupid and naive that he believes in heroes, but because he is one.
Click then locked eyes with Wessel. He doesn't get out of trouble, he stops the trouble. Like Click should. Like I will. He then started making calculations. What, did he have a nervous breakdown? Wessel has plenty of arrows, and there isn't any time delay. That kind of crossbow reloads, so now what?
Click held his shield up, "Hey, Wessel! What's wrong, is somebody having a 'zad day'?"
"DON'T MOCK MY ACCENT!!!" He started firing off, Click blocked them.
"Aww, but it's so much fun... Fine, let's talk about how you don't have any guts. You didn't even think Escartez would last, so you sided with that child, Xeranad, to save your own skin!"
"It vus for ze kingdom!"
Click dodged the next few arrows. "Really? I could be mistaken, but killing the king didn't seem to much good for the kingdom. I mean, KING, KINGdom? Hell-o-ooo?"
"You vould not understand, you've never had to watch as a wuthless warrior takes over ze world why you do nothing!"
"Are you kidding?" Click dodged more arrows as he stepped forward, "ALL I EVER DID WAS NOTHING!!"
"What about vatching as your home gets closer and closer to being conquered?"
"This is my home."
Click got in closer, he had to get him alive, or no one would beleive them.