Place your napkin on your lap!

"My napkin on my lap?" you say to the being, who nods. You still can't discern whether it's a male or a female, so you leave it for the time being. "But sir ... uh, madam ... or whatever you are, I'm standing up. Wouldn't it fall off?"


"It would, though! Haven't you ever heard of Sir Isaac Newton and his discovery?" you protest.

"Why yes," the being answered. "In fact, he's residing here right now!" The being points at something indistinct, and you squint. It's walking closer to you, and suddenly  you know what it is.

"Sir Isaac Newton!" you say, bowing.

"Don't flatter me," Sir Isaac Newton says, striding up to you.

"I have a question for you," you say. "Will you answer it?"

"Depends," Sir Isaac Newton says, swaying slightly and examining his nails.

"Are you alright there, Sir Isaac Newton?" you ask, staring curiously at the sway that he seemed to have developed.

"Why, yes, why do you ask?"

"You seem to have developed a ... a sway there, Sir."

Suddenly everything becomes twisted, like a special effect in a camera app.

The End

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