I consistently flickered through the channels; nothing excitingly good was on. I should be at the biggest party of the year, but it seems like my brother’s more important than me; to be honest when isn't he? I herd a light sigh coming form the corner of our large modern room; I'd never really been a fan of materialistic things, I always wandered what it would have been like a couple hundred years ago when none of this mattered. I tiptoed watching every step and a peered over to the coat. My sister laid their like a sweet angel a musky sweet smell came from were she laid peacefully, some times I wished that I was still at her age, not yet being exposed to the harsh reality of life. Her curly blond hair covered her rosy cheeks. My old decrepit phone was buzzing on the dark oak coffee table. I looked at the name and immediately rolled my eyes knowing it was going to bad news, my mother was bad news.
“What do you want mum? Thought of another way to ruin my night?” I questioned sharply, I was thinking she was going to go on how I shouldn't talk to my mother like that; shame she wasn't there for half my childhood so how should I know?
“Get a grip of your self you can’t always what you want Alex, all I wanted to say is that we might me a bit late but your dad will take a short cut; even if we do get back early I doubt that you’ll even make the end of the party” there was silence from both ends, anger rolled through out my body all I wanted to do was punch something most probably something with my mum’s face on it. There was a light screech coming from the cot. I instantly declined my mother who was on the other side of the line; Daisy had woken up, her crystal blue eyes shimmer with tears. Not because she was sad or upset just because of the bright glow from the lamp what was hanging over the cot most two year old would cry for their mum's and learn there mother name first but not daisy I was always there for her, since my brothers heart condition got worse my mum treated us as second class citizens; I do love my brother but I had a hurting heart too, maybe not physically but I was hurting inside and I was left alone with dealing with it. Numerous accounts of driving up and down the country but I know for a fact that deep inside Jacob knows he's not going to make it.
Daisy had gone asleep insistently, her small rounded head lent against my left shoulder, and I could feel her warm breath dance against my pale neck. I was very careful when it came to picking up my sister; I didn’t want my thick hair prickling her soft peachy skin disturbing her sweet dreams.
God where could they be? It was already eleven. I really didn’t understand why they had to leave Daisy with me; don’t get me wrong I love her she’s the best thing that has happened to me in the last two years. I yawned cautiously and trying to create too much movement whilst Daisy slept on my hard pointed shoulders I gingerly walked over to the cold leather sofa. My eye lids felt heavy they were being dragged down; sleep was winning over, but when didn’t it?
There was a loud shrill almost making me drop Daisy, she whined for a few seconds then fell back into her deep sleep. Who would be calling at this time? My shimmering deep blue eyes squinted so I could see the caller ID from where I was siting not really wanting to move. It said ‘Mum Mob’, mum never called on the house phone. A frown crawled upon my confused face. I picked it up and took a deep breath before mum was going to have a go at me for hanging up, but it wasn’t mum.
“Hello? Hello? Is anyone there” A strange unfamiliar voice said, it sounded like a lady in her mid forties; I could tell by her shaky voice that something was wrong.
“Erm…yes….where’s my mum?” I asked trying to keep calm. She must have left her phone at a service station or something; I kept telling myself keep calm and don’t panic.
There was only silence at the other end.
“Hello?”I asked trying not getting impatient
“A-a-are you her daughter?” How was this relevant? My hands started to clam up.
“I’m sorry” She replied. My frown became deeper, my hand became clammier and my head was spinning.
“W-what do y-you mean?” I almost whispered but enough for the lady to hear, I haddn't had a stutter since year four but it only arose from my mouth when I was scared or worried, the words lingered on my red lips. I felt a large knot rising up in my throat I could feel it comming higher and higher as I impatently waited for the lady to answer.
“She’s dead- I was going to ask about dad but then she spoke-"and your father"- I already knew the answer- "and your brother” I fourcefully tried pushing back the tears but they just blurred my sight and sprouted out or eyes. My hands were shaking figurously, the phone dropped on the wooden floor a high pitched ringing sound echoed out then stoped, the sound made Daisy wake up. Her head popped up from the sofa where I'd laided, looking at her made the tears crawl out my tearduckt even more, it was useless mortal thing I could not fight any longer, they were just a sighn to show you were hurting but that wasn't the way I wanted to live my life.
Why? When? How? There must have been some sort of confusion. The same questions rung through my head like millions of wasp they don’t sting you once and just die they come back again and again. Daisys small dimpled hands reached out for me I picked her up, she wrapped her arms around my slim neck. They can’t have been dead, they just simply couldn’t. I kept missing out every other heart beat. I tried to hide my pain behind trying not to scare Daisy. We had to get the closest hospital which was twenty minuets away I knew they werent that far away, the paramedics would have tooken then their straight away, I felt like screaming, tears still ran out clear and salty. I wrapped Daisy in her pink coat and wellies she looked so lost and confused but know she knows something isnt right but she cant put her little dimpled finger on it , didn’t bother with myself we neede to get there as soon as possible my white t-shirt and skinnys will have to do, I grabbed the car keys. It had been raining, the millions of droplets of water looked like diamonds embedded onto the midnight black hood of the car. I felt like walking away from the pain but I had to face up to it whether I found it or it found me. Why me? I kept asking my self, Daisy still confued looked up at me and wipped my tears away.
We got to the A&E but it was a waist of time, I would have much rather got punched in the face ten time then find out it was because of me they died. The doctor said they speeded they wanted to get home early for some reason; but that some reason was my fault, I knew it from the pit of my stomach. Daisy started to get fidgety in my arms, and moaned for mum. I wiped my tears with my back of my shaking hand, the doctor chewd on his bottem lip for a moment and look up into my eyes, his deep brown eyes seemed to look right through her.
"have you got anywhere to stay, anyone to lookafter you?" He asked, I knew that if i told him he would probably get the social services becasue i knew for a fact that none of my family member would help.
"Erm, well" a frown grew up onto his face.