The Pursuit Of HappinessMature

This one was what I wrote for my SECOND LAST EVER ^_^ Piece of assessment for English.
I usually only post the stuff I choose to write, but I was quite proud of this one :)

I looked over the table at her sitting there smiling and laughing, her hair dancing in the breeze, eyes glimmering in the sun. They flashed me a gorgeous glance and my heart skipped a beat. 
The wind picked up and whispered scents of her to me. I wondered what it would be like to run my hand through her silky auburn waves. Or for those beautiful deep blue eyes to look into mine with love as I longed them too. 

She was perfect. I don't think she knew. I don't think she even tried. Beauty often couples naivety unfortunately. And she wouldn't find out either. How could she? God knows I wouldn't tell her. I've not the guts.
She wouldn't guess. At our age, though we all like to put a facade of  knowledge, we are all as experienced as each other. Or INexperianced. 

It was obvious though, now I think about it. I was always sure to laugh at  her jokes, politely compliment her, trying to impress her in what few ways I could. Discreetly catching glimpses whenever they made themselves available and holding her hypnotic gaze whenever it seemed appropriate and when no-one would notice our few seconds of intimacy and try to join in or steal it.
Though somehow the real picture seemed just out of reach, slightly blurred. As if the idea of me and her together was preposterous and impossible. As if fate thought it an absurd notion.

The more I think about it, it very well may have been preposterous and impossible. I certainly thought it impossible. Though I dreamed about it, I imagined her sitting beside me, my hand around her waist, or entwined with hers, looking into her pretty eyes, smelling her enchanting scent, kissing her lips and at just the thought of it I felt a cooling wave of Happiness and tranquillity was over me. 
Or my illusion of Happiness, never to be my reality. 

It was all because I was scared. inexperienced. Naive. At the same time as infuriating me to insane levels, I s'pose my shyness also protected me. I had never known love but at the same time, my emotional timidness protected me from heart-break and feelings of loss and ache that others would have to endure.
Still, it would have been nice to have a  hand to hold, a smile to reciprocate, an inside joke to laugh at.

My shyness may protected me, but because of it, ironically what I didn't know was so did hers, she hid as much as me. Equally as afraid of it all. Equally as afraid of approaching someone with words more than platonic. Perhaps even those forming themselves into the shy request of a date.  

could tell the others would have loved to get to know her better as well, but I don't think they stood a chance. And that's probably what angered me the most. Though they seemed tough, eager to show their apparent masculinity and prove themselves worthy, she wouldn't go for that type. She was smarter than that... I think. Because while the 'bad boys' may have had a certain appeal I knew she would want someone with at least a medium level of intelligence, one with which to hold a decent conversation and not just to listen to what new 'sick shit' had happened.
I knew I could provide what she wanted... Or at least what I hope she wanted, but how could I approach her when I didn't even think I had it in me?  

 

I looked over the table at her sitting there smiling and laughing, her hair dancing in the breeze, eyes glimmering in the sun. They flashed me a gorgeous glance and my heart skipped a beat. 
The wind picked up and whispered scents of her to me.  

As perfect as ever. 

thought back to a similar time, only a faint memory nowadays, slightly foggy with the mists of time. But I remember clearly my emotions, how the picture seemed almost blurred, out of reach.
But how beautiful she was. She hadn't changed. Not a bit. Except she now was mine.

Oh how times change, now I gazed at the beautiful picture every day, no longer a feeling of want and longing, but of pure joy.

I had my hand to hold. My smile to reciprocate. The inside joke to laugh at.

had true Happiness.

The End

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