Is this the end for Rumplestilskin?

Suddenly the doors open and a harrassed looking little woman rushes in. She scurries over to the judge and hands her a sheet of paper, and a thick piece of parchment with a red wax seal at the bottom.

She reads the note, then looks at the parchment, her jaw dropping as she reads. She then beckons the Narrator over and whispers in his ear. He nods eagerly. She then whispers in the ear of the Clerk of the Court, who scurries out again.

Judge Wicked E Witch:   Ladies and gentleman.... and other entities... of the Jury, It seems that someone with an interest in the outcome of this case has come forward.   Messrs. Rumpelstiltskin, Stumblebumpkin and Collywobblekin, please approach the bench. (All three move to stand in front of the judge) Now please listen carefully – I have some sad news for you.

Rumpelstiltskin: Oh no!

Stumblebumpkin: Oh dear!

Collywobblekin: Fizzlewidget!

Judge Wicked E Witch:  Now, it appears that your mother is gravely ill. She is not expected to survive the afternoon. (The brothers gasp and and go into a group hug.) She did, however call a lawyer to the hospital where she made (she holds up the parchment) this declaration. It has been notarised and I am therefore prepared to admit it as testimony.   It shall be logged on the record as Exhibit A. I will make it available for the Jury to study after the contents have been read.

(The jury mutter and mumble and say ''rhubarb, rhubarb'')

Judge Wicked E Witch: I have asked the Narrator to read the document, as it is ... ahem ... right up his street, shall we say? Gentlemen, your late ... sorry, ailing... mother appears to have been somewhat of a poet.   Narrator, please begin.

(The Narrator struts self-importantly to the witness stand, and draws himself up to his full height of five feet one inch and hitches up his tights.)

Narrator:   The end of my life is approaching so fast.   A secret I have of a spell that was cast.   When I was a young girl, a witch I did cross.   She bid me do something.  It was my loss. (He looks up at the judge, nodding vigorously.)  I say, Your Honour, This is really rather good!

Judge Wicked E Witch: Yes, isn't it? Please continue.

Narrator:   The witch made me promise that when I was wed, the child of my womb she would take from my bed.   And so when I knew I was going to give birth,   I really did wish I could flee from this earth. (He looks round the courtroom. Several people, including the judge, are wiping away tears.)   Then came my time and I bolted my door. But instead of just one child, I gave birth to... FOUR?

The entire court:   FOUR?

Rumpelstiltskin:   Not triplets then...

Stumblebumpkin:   Quads, that'd be...

Collywobblekin:   Ozzleywaggum...

Judge Wicked E Witch:   Narrator, I feel it would be best if I take up the story from here.   The Jury can read the whole thing presently, but I fear that if we continue, the whole court will be in floods of tears and we are in danger of drowning.  (She looks at the Narrator, who is heaving great sobs as he reads the rest of the parchment.)

Rumpelstiltskin:   So she gave one of us to this witch?

Judge Wicked E Witch:   Yes, I am afraid that is the case. She had to choose... It was... terrible,  poor woman. (She pulls out a huge green handkerchief and wipes her own tears.)

Stumblebumpkin:   And where is our brother?

Judge Wicked E Witch:   I was just coming to that. The parchment gives the whereabouts of your long-lost sibling.   I have already asked the Clerk of the Court to send all the King's horses and all the King's men to bring this new witness to this court.   I think this will be a suitable point to adjourn.   We will resume after lunch.

Rumpelstiltskin:   And then we will meet our brother?

Judge Wicked E Witch:    No... The fourth child was a baby girl. You will meet your SISTER... Simblesimpkin!

The End

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