Chapter 1Mature

This is the first (and so far only) story I have written. Looking for honest feedback so I can improve :).

'It's not fair' Dawn muttered as she wandered through one of the many fields surrounding the village where she lived.

Wiping her eyes with one sleeve of her plain green dress she continued her mutterings .'Why does she always take Jen to town and not me'.

Slowly as she continued walking through the fields she became aware of the woods not far ahead of her. Dawn slowed her pace as she remembered always being told to stay out of there. She had always wondered why, it was quite big for sure but it was not dark and creepy like the evil forests in her story books.

After a quick look around to see if anyone was near she decided to head in. 'After all it's not like they'll care if I get eaten by monsters' she thought.

As she neared the edge of the woods she started having second thoughts, after all she usually did as her father and step-mother told her, but this time Dawn thought 'I'm going to ignore them like they ignore me'. Taking a deep breath she continued onwards into the shade of the woods.

'It's actually not that bad here' she thought as she wandered deeper into the woods. As she went further in she noticed it becoming rather gloomy, and the air started to feel slightly chilled, but determined not to be a coward Dawn forged ahead. After a few minutes walking Dawn came across an overgrown but still passable path leading into the centre of the woods. 'I wonder where this leads' she muttered as she started to follow it, curious as she had never heard of anyone going into this wood even in the past it had always been forbidden to enter.

Despite tripping over tree roots a time or two, Dawn carried on even though she was starting to feel discomforted by the odd feeling of strangeness that seemed to come from the centre of the woods.

After having followed the path for a time it finally entered a clearing. Dawn hovered at the entrance scared by the gloomy almost oppressive air inside, but her natural curiosity pushed her onwards determined to see what was here. After walking a few paces into the clearing she saw something under a large tree at the rearmost edge of the clearing. Intrigued she pushed down her doubts and went to investigate.

As she got nearer to the tree she began to make out what seemed to be a ruined cottage that was overgrown with moss and weeds. Approaching she knelt and looked closer at the stones, they were quite roughly made and more interestingly they were blackened like the stones of the old Jameson house after it was destroyed by a fire. Her imagination becoming caught up in wondering who had lived here and what had happened to them and the building itself she started looking inside for any clues, only distantly noticing the strange feeling urging her onwards.

As she reached what looked like the remains of the cottage's fireplace she felt an urging to kneel and start moving the tumbled down stones from the chimney. After a while, arms aching from the unfamiliar effort of moving so many stones her eye was caught by a glimmer of light from something still partially buried in the dirt and moss. The strange almost frightening urge she had been feeling since she entered the ruins became stronger still, digging franticly with her hands she uncovered the object, a feeling of relief replacing the former one of urgency as she grasped it in her dirty scratched hands.

It was a pendant, rubbing gently she slowly removed the dirt first from the quite crude black metal chain, then she started uncovering the pendant itself. Slowly she began to get an impression of its form, it was some kind of face, though unlike anything she had seen before, vaguely human in features but the proportions were all wrong it had a tiny nose with a large mouth and bulbous staring eyes all set in a misshapen almost abstract face. The most unsettling thing was the aura it seemed to emit, it seemed to radiate a sense of wrongness, but Dawn also felt a strange desire to posses it and to study it.

Suddenly realising how long she had been in the woods, Dawn stood, stuffed the pendant in her pocket and hurried to get home, hoping that she could find her way back before it got dark.

The End

4 comments about this story Feed