How to Fill Your High-School Administrator's Office With Balloons

In 3 Easy Steps!

1 - Acquire balloons
Not just any old balloons, mind you. If you were going to fill your high-school coach's office with balloons, you could probably get away with generic balloons, but when you're filling your high-school administrator's office, you have to bring your best game. Those long, bendy, twisty balloons used to make balloon animals top the list, if you actually make balloon animals out of them before filling your high-school administrator's office. Make more than one kind of balloon animal. Consider monkeys, emus and squid. If you don't have the skill to make balloon animals and cannot afford our 24-hour-balloon-animal-by-mail correspondence course, it is acceptable to use weather balloons. The advantage weather balloons have over those long, bendy, twisty balloons used to make balloon animals is that you can fill the typical high-school administrator's office using only two or three weather balloons.

2 - Acquire Accomplices
For this project to succeed, you will need help. Sure, you think you can just walk into your high-school administrator's office, start dumping balloons on the floor, and walk back out, but, face it, you're wrong. The whole point of this undertaking is to completely fill your high-school administrator's office with balloons without your high-school administrator knowing you did it. (It is conceivable that your high-school administrator's office could be filled with balloons while your high-school administrator is actually in the office, but that process falls outside the scope of this 3-step guide.) So, start acquiring your accomplices. Friends can help get the job done, but give careful consideration to their potential character flaws: avoid relying on friends who can't keep a secret, do not employ friends with asthma, and by all means avoid any friends with scissors for hands. If you can coerce your school's maintenance person, secretary, or even librarian into assisting, your work will be much easier. An elephant will make short work of inflating your balloons. Of course, ninjas are always the best accomplices.

3 - Fill the Office
If you have hired ninjas to assist, this step will take care of itself. However, if your local ninja union prohibits the filling of offices with balloons, you may have to get in there yourself. Keep in mind that you will have to fill the room while the door and any windows are closed so that the balloons do not escape. We recommend using our patented Mission Impossible rope-and-winch rig to lower yourself and the balloons into the office through the skylight. If your high-school administrator's office does not have a skylight, we suggest installing one.

Now that you've filled your high-school administrator's office with balloons, sit back and wait for the fun!

The End

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