There are, of course, a plethora of rules by which to live, written by people who died long ago. It is for these reasons that I have created the following rules.
1. Always say "hello" to nuns: it's important to rack up points.
2. Never sell your Nintendo 64 for $20.
3. Eat sugar on a daily--if not hourly--basis. The quality of your life will greatly improve.
4. Never mention WWII without giving the French their credit (we will find you)
5. Quote Audrey Hepburn whenever possible.