Frustrated? Confused? Fed up with "it all"? Unclear on what "it all" is, anyway? Welcome to The Official Rulebook, your cheap and relatively correct guide to "life".
[Suicide notes, chapter three]
Have you ever wondered what It's all about?
Have you found yourself stranded on the desert island of life without a metaphorical escape plan?*
Have you ever thought "that's just cheating", and been right?
Don't you wish somebody would just figure out the rules, for once?
THE OFFICIAL RULEBOOK
containing therein handy tips and precepts for the wise
Now in its fourty-second edition!!
revised, revamped, rehashed, and thoroughly scrutinized
AND CHEAPER THAN EVER!!!
Expand your knowledge on such useful topics as:
The dangers of bursting out laughing
The inevitable sinkholes that come with thickening plots
The inadvisability of "wigging out" in public, and its effect on the toupee industry
The Guillotine Guild's political views
The recession's effect on the dime, and why nothing was really worth one, anyway
Why crying bloody murder will not help your situation in the event of one
AND MUCH, MUCH MORE!
*Suicide Notes, chapter three