The Nightmare

Today when I woke up I was sweating. I wondered if it was for some nightmare that I had last night. I tried to pull back my memory, to remember what exactly I had seen or thought?? Was it someone I knew?? Was it some incidence? There was a deep sense of fear and I felt I had seen something that had scared me badly. My body was racking with shivers. I hugged myself tight and drank some water to calm my quivering body. I just could not remember what I had dreamt about. Yet it gnawed at the back of my mind.

I rummaged through the bed drawers for my glasses; I couldn’t find them. I looked closely at the alarm clock that had jolted me back to reality. It was almost 9 and I had an important meeting at 10. Recently things weren't going so well with me at work. Lots of backlog and a demanding new boss all were trying me on the verge of a breakdown. I went to the washroom to find my spare pair of glasses. I put them on and peered closely at my myopic self. All I saw a pale/ thin drawn face with a pronounced jaw line and thin lips tightly set. My skin today looked almost transparent just like the mirror itself sees light green veins near my eyes. I come across as an introvert and a studious nerd as many people have told me and for this reason only I have recently taken to wearing contact lenses when I’m out of my house. Suddenly I was once again caught up in the reverie. I recalled a female outline with very long open hair. I couldn’t place the outline with anyone I knew. Suddenly I was swept off with an overpowering floral fragrance and in the corner of eth mirror I felt a shadow move. I whirled back and leaped across to the bedroom where the shadow had moved only to find no one. On my bedroom drawer I could see some fresh wild flowers. I tentatively picked them and smelled them only to remember the same scent that I had whiffed before seeing that image. I thought hard of who could put the flowers. My maid came long after I had left for office and even if she had put them how could they be so fresh and anyhow these were not any flowers that I had seen in this city. A thought nagged on my mind that I had seen these flowers somewhere before but could place the thought of where and when?? I glanced around and checked the living room and the kitchen. No one. One look at the wall clock jolted me back to the present. I rushed through my bath and tried to keep off the weird thoughts I had since morning.

 Let me tell you here I live alone on the 10th floor of the Platinum apartments, a company accommodation. You would wonder why alone, well I think I should tell you more about myself. I'm from the countryside; I made it big in college and was given a campus placement in this big city. I'm a loner from the very beginning, my family too finds me a recluse, and maybe they think I'm not just concerned. And I I’m anyways from a joint family so they are busy with my siblings and I have just drifted away from them and as a matter of fact I can't sit with them and talk. I prefer being alone and rarely go to meet them and they never wanted to force themselves on me. 

Now back to the point I’m not the one to get easily scared. You see I’ve been staying alone for so long and it has never bothered me. I’ve never believed in some God and so never thought of the Satan. So I was mainly taken aback when I saw that vision. But then I gave myself of the logic of being obsessed with the dream I couldn’t remember but the flowers bothered me. I started off for my office only to find in the parking that I had forgotten my car keys. I rushed up the lift again and picked up the keys. When I was about to lock I felt that something wasn’t right. There was an eerie feel to the apartment and I felt that my Guitar had been moved. I knew precisely where I had put it last night. I stood there for a moment in the shadows of the dark gold curtains of the living room which gave a weird glow to the room. I rocked myself back to the situation and told myself that these were some new stories my mind was weaving.

I took off in earnest for my office. The day was going fine till lunch. Suddenly I got an attack of migraine. I am a migraine patient you see, have had it since I was 10. I keep fighting it for days all together; it commonly lasts up to 48 hours. All those hours of continuous torture where in situations where I can barely see. Seemingly apparitions that I see! I see zagged lines; my ability to think is almost lost on these days. All I generally do is sleep and take my medications. Lately I have some to feel that I see imaginary things also during these days. I cursed myself for being obsessed with the thoughts of the nightmare. Maybe I was aggravating my problem. I went in the company smoking area for a walk and a light. I peered out of the window to see dark black skies. I was amazed as the day had started on a sunny note. Soon it started raining. I again had a nagging thought about my morning dream. I tried not to think too hard as my forehead was throbbing with the pain but I could not pull my mind from the dream. When the pelting drops turned into a down pour it suddenly struck me that in my dream it was raining too; a similar downpour. Too hard for anyone to go out but I was out and driving. The images were suddenly flashing before my eyes like a movie. In a trance like state I saw myself driving my car and trying hard to concentrate on the road as nothing was visible except for a sheet of water and all was just a blurred vision. I didn’t seem to know what route to take and I could see no other vehicle on the road. Finally when I could not go along any further I stopped my car at a spot. It was getting too dark and by the look of the secluded place it didn’t seem at all a safe place to get out. Suddenly it just stopped raining. It was like magic, like it was a bad downpour and suddenly no rain at all, as if someone switches off the shower that ones taking. I couldn’t recognize the place. I locked all my doors and sat there contemplating what to do next. Suddenly a smell of wild flowers was in there inside the car and a strange dizziness overtook me. I felt real sleepy as I was under some anesthesia. My eyes were closing. I don’t know why but I saw myself taking out my contacts and I slept within the car.


The End

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