Meanwhile, in Jennifer Anniston's deep dark cave

If you passed down under the roots of the big slime-covered tree at the border of the Frog-bidden Forest, you would find a small and very smelly hole. In that hole were numerous spiders, slugs, snails, insects and various other species of blind wiggly things.

The floor of the cave-hole was covered in thick slimy muck with little red, green and dark yellow blobby things that smothered everthing in a very strong smell of old socks, dead tadpole and just the faintest whiff of lump porridge. If you so much as put your toe in it, then you'd lose your foot.

But, beneath all the sludge and grime and wet-slippery-stuff-that-resembles-custard, there lurked a nameless horror. A creature so evil and vile that it was only ever seen on television or it's gaze would turn you to jello.

Jennifer Aniston. Or, to give it it's full title: Almighty Queen of Evil and Deputy Prime-Minister of Moral Dubiousness.

The monster raised it's head from the goop, making a stomach-churning "plurplesmucklebleugh" as it did so, it's wide mouth spilling the contents of it's last meal into the muck. A second monster rose out of the slime beside it, a large pale-grey basilisk with lamplike not-yellow-but-not-orange eyes. It's name was Marley and it was the ugliest damn basilisk on the face of the earth with grotesque lumps and boils growing all over it and a huge sty over it's left eyelid. It let out a low half-moan-half-snarl and looked at it's equally monstrous mistress, who nodded it's head.

It had only been a day since the monsters had eaten, but now they were hungry again.

For human intestines.

The End

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