Edward Rooney for Ferris Bueller


Dear Sir/Madam

Re: Parole Officer Training Programme, Chicago

Thank you for your request for a reference for Ferris Bueller, a former student at this school. 

I must admit that I was surprised, yet pleased, to learn that Ferris had applied for a place on your training programme.  It appears that he has grown-up considerably in the intervening year since he graduated from this school.  Ferris spent the last two semesters of his final year under my close, personal supervision and I am pleased that this seems to have had a long-term sobering effect on his too “fun-loving” personality.

I am sure that your programme will cure Ferris of any remaining foibles he may still possess – in particular, his inherent disregard for authority figures and rules.  Ferris requires a firm hand and a close eye, in order to perform to the best of his ability.  Please rest assured that, despite his laidback demeanour, Ferris is very able.

Ferris has charm and persuasive skills in abundance, which he will need to succeed in the demanding role of a Parole Officer.  He was a popular member of the student body here and had many friends from all walks of life.  (I understand from my secretary that he was considered to be ‘a righteous dude’.)  He is therefore accustomed to dealing with people from very different backgrounds to his own middle-class upbringing.  As you no doubt will have noted from your own checks into his personal history, his father works in the City and his mother in real estate.  Ferris’ sister, Jeanie, works as a self-defence teacher.

My one concern is that you state that trainees will be required to participate in an intensive training programme.  Please note that, until his final semester, Ferris did not have what we consider to be an exemplary attendance record.  In one particular semester he was absent a total of 9 times, although I’m afraid our records for that period are incomplete due to an IT malfunction at the time.

Nonetheless, I wish Ferris the best of luck for the future and remain hopeful that he will turn into a responsible member of our community.

Yours faithfully


Edward R. Rooney

Dean of Students

The End

10 comments about this story Feed