I finally find my room again. The door has my name in normal, printed letters beside the room number on a worn sheet of paper. Victoria Fragil. My parents' name had an ironic fate for me before any of this happened. I reach for the doorknob, but my hand goes right through. Taking a deep breath, I walk through the door, feeling slightly uncomfortable.
Back in freshmen year, if anyone would have told me that ghosts were real they would have gotten a glare from me and my best friend, the most skeptical girl in the school, second only to me. Now I can practical kick myself for my ignorance. But my best friend is another matter that I'm not in the mood to explore. Her betrayal flows through me like the pain of my current situation.
Sighing, I sit down in my favourite spot of the room. From here, beside the door, I can see both my sleeping body and the window just a few feet away from the bed. The sun is already lowering behind the buildings. Time passes a lot faster when you're semi-dead.
Pulling my knees up until my chin is resting on them, I begin to sob softly. I curse my decisions and my pain and my anger. Though I hate that I hurt the ones I love with my choice, I don't think it was wrong. I can still feel the sharp pain of everything that has happened in the past year as if it all had occurred yesterday. I wrap my arms around my knees and hide my face in my lap, crying harder with the memories of everything. The yelling and fighting of my parents, my sister's over-achievements that bordered on rivalry, my brother's hidden pain. My best friend's betrayal, my boyfriends lack of love for me, my dreams crashing down around me like the ashes of a volcano that had long ago prepared to erupt on me.
"Why?" The voice is faint, but loud enough for me to look up. The room is gone and I am lost in the darkness again. I am sitting down on emptiness, giving me the eerie feeling of floating. "Why?"
I clear the tears from my eyes and look around me. "Who are you?" I demand. "What do you want?" My voice echoes solemnly.
Then a light, as soft as one of the sun's rays shines down beside me and I see that there's a small pond. In fact, it is so small that it can easily be just a large puddle. "What is this?" I call out. "I don't understand any of this!"
"Why?" The voice cries to me faintly as it dissolves into the water beside me. I look at the puddle and skim my hands over the top, watching the ripples glide to the other end. "Watch." The sudden order makes me shudder and almost immediately an image appears on the surface, the ripples long gone. I see a familiar face and reach out to touch him, as a consequence I am pulled into the world in the water.